¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

People who has many pets

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ¼±*¸²
2021-04-27 716

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Almost everyone want to have a pet such as a dog or a cat. Also, they think sometimes it will be happy to raise many animals for their pets. However, is it really for owner to raise many animals? I think yes because many animal are friendly. When we back to the house from the work, they will welcome us as well as we won't be lonely. At the same time, I think no because If many animals are in my house, I think that I couldn't focus on each animals. In the other word, It can be happen that I can't take care them well. As a result, If I have many pets, It is bigger that I can't do well on them than that they give me happiness. So, I think it's better to raise one or two pets.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello Arim!

Thanks for doing your homework.  This will be of great help for your improvement! Keep it up!

-T. Maine


Almost everyone want to have a pet such as a dog or a cat.

>>Almost everyone wants to have a pet such as a dog or a cat.

Also, they think sometimes it will be happy to raise many animals for their pets.

>>Also, they sometimes think it is happier to raise many animals as their pets.

However, is it really for owner to raise many animals?

>>However, is it really good for owners to raise many animals?

I think yes because many animal are friendly.

>>I think yes because many animals are friendly.

When we back to the house from the work, they will welcome us as well as we won't be lonely.

>>When we go back to our houses from work, they will welcome us, so we won't be lonely.

At the same time, I think no because If many animals are in my house, I think that I couldn't focus on each animals.

>>In contrast, I think no because if many animals are in my house, I think I couldn't focus on taking care of each animal.

In the other word, It can be happen that I can't take care them well.

>>In other words, I can't raise them well.

As a result, If I have many pets, It is bigger that I can't do well on them than that they give me happiness.

>>As a result, if I have many pets, I can't take care of them more than all as well as they can't also give me happiness.

So, I think it's better to raise one or two pets.

>>So I think it's better to raise only one or two pets.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
107958 Do you agree that cryptocurrency should be taxed? Why or why not? ±Ç*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-04-27 599
107957 A review of a new restaurant. ±è*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-27 587
107956 interview Q ±Ç*½Ã ¿Ï·á 2021-04-27 0
107955 Homework (271) ¹Ú*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-27 641
107954 The reason I believe in life after death ±è*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-04-27 595
107953 Do you think that women should also join the military there in... ±è*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-04-27 529
107952 What¡¯s a dysfunctional family? What are some Characteristics Of... ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-27 774
107951 homework ±è*ºñ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-27 0
107950 People who has many pets ¼±*¸² ¿Ï·á 2021-04-27 716
107949 Delivery apps ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-27 2
107948 homework ¹Ú*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-04-27 5
107947 Homework ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-04-27 643
107946 Do you think you are a helpful person? ¹Ú*°æ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-27 668
107945 grammar ¼Õ*¸² ¿Ï·á 2021-04-27 698
107944 How to broaden my vocabulary ÀÌ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-27 586
107943 Are you afraid of making mistakes? Why or why not? ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-04-27 1
107942 Do you think that women should also join the military there in... ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-04-27 0
107941 Homework °­*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-27 1130
107940 Way it\'s good to be young. ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-04-27 890
107939 Do you ever wish you could go back in time and be a little kid... ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-04-27 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04