¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Do you think that women should also join the military there in Korea?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¿ø
2021-04-27 531

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

No, I don¡¯t think so. Because we have women¡¯s army corps so women can join it if they want. But I think it should not be necessarily because women have a period for every months so it will be hard to do it. I think it¡¯s enough with them.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Heidi! Women joining the military has been a big controversy in South Korea. There has been speculations that it promotes gender inequality. I think that they should allow women to join the military but not mandatorily. Only the volunteers shall enter it because some women are not capable of doing things like that. If you have the ability, then you can. But if you don't, it's fine. :) Thanks for sharing your opinion. 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon!

No, I don¡¯t think so. Because we have women¡¯s army corps so women can join it if they want. 
>> No, I don't think so because there is already a women's army corporation for women who want to join the militay. 

But I think it should not be necessarily because women have a period for every months so it will be hard to do it. 
>> Although I think it should not be necessary because women experience monthly periods so it would be difficult for them to do. 

I think it¡¯s enough with them.
>> I think that would be enough. 
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
107999 A good leader must be a good follower; What if your superiors... À¯*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-28 1
107998 Do you believe that wishes come true? ±è*±¹ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-28 4
107997 [04/23]Homework ¹Ú*¹ü ¿Ï·á 2021-04-28 0
107996 grammar ¼Õ*¸² ¿Ï·á 2021-04-28 554
107995 I think I have to think about this... ±è*¶û ¿Ï·á 2021-04-28 904
107994 My job after retirement ÀÌ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2021-04-28 608
107993 From my work Á¤*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-28 1
107992 HOMEWORK Á¤*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-28 0
107991 My mistakes when I have a conversation in English ÁÖ*³ª ¿Ï·á 2021-04-28 4
107990 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-28 0
107989 Homework ÀÌ*¾Ö ¿Ï·á 2021-04-28 1
107988 Out ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-04-28 505
107987 How do you communicate well to your colleagues at work? ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-04-28 734
107986 ^ - ^ Â÷*ºó ¿Ï·á 2021-04-28 919
107985 Are you afraid of making mistakes? Why or why not? ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-28 553
107984 Wednesday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-04-28 509
107983 There are many female students who finish degrees in science and... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-28 454
107982 Homework ÀÓ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2021-04-28 5
107981 How do you loosen up? Á¶*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-28 638
107980 SMILE ANSWER º¯*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-28 610

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04