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영작교정 게시판

영어 말하기와 쓰기를 동시에 잡는다!

자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
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담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

For Earth

작성자: 정*주
2021-05-18 558

회원님의 영작문

If I can change about the world, I want Plastic to be disappeared in the world. Because of human, there is too much trash in the world and most of them can not be decomposed naturally. Therefore, you can see garbage everywhere, like in the river, on the road or even deep in the mountain. There are many kinds of trash and one of the most thing in the world is plastic. Nowdays, people use delivery service and take-out service much more than before. This is because Covid-19 spreading seriously, they think using plastic is hygienically better than using just cup or bowl which can be used again and again. In addition, a lot of people use plastic things only one time and throw away as a trash, even though it can be used more times. All of these makes our Earth illed. If it keeps going, finally all that's left in Earth will be plastic. Therefore, I want to make something which can be used instead of plastic or just delete ideas about plastic to make human not know even plastic can be exist.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용


Hi Julia, thank you for this. Have a great day!
Jasmin


If I can change about the world, I want Plastic to be disappeared in the world.
>>If I can change something about the world, I would never let plastics be invented. 
 Because of human, there is too much trash in the world and most of them can not be decomposed naturally.
>>Humans are causing all the trash on Earth and most of the trash cannot be decompose.
 Therefore, you can see garbage everywhere, like in the river, on the road or even deep in the mountain. There are many kinds of trash and one of the most thing in the world is plastic.
>>Therefore, you can see a lot of  garbage everywhere, you can see it in the river, on the street, and even in the deep mountains. Plastics are everywhere. 
 Nowdays, people use delivery service and take-out service much more than before.
>>Nowadays, people use delivery services and take-out service often that before. 
This is because Covid-19 spreading seriously, they think using plastic is hygienically better than using just cup or bowl which can be used again and again.
>>This is because of the pandemic outbreak. people think that using a disposable utensils are better than using the reusable utensils. 
 In addition, a lot of people use plastic things only one time and throw away as a trash, even though it can be used more times.
>>That is why a lot of people use a lot of plastic materials nowadays than before. People will throw it right away that reuse it a couple of times. 
 All of these makes our Earth illed.
>>All of these are causing life on Earth to vanish.
 If it keeps going, finally all that's left in Earth will be plastic.
>>If we don't stop it, plastics pollution will impact our future. 
Therefore, I want to make something which can be used instead of plastic or just delete ideas about plastic to make human not know even plastic can be exist.
>>Therefore, I want to make something that will replace plastic. All is not lost, humanity created this problem and humanity can still do something in its power to reverse the impact of this on Earth.   
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