¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What do you think should the government of South Korea focus on?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ·ù*ÁÖ
2021-06-07 406

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I think nowadays, the goverment of South Korea is so much focusing on the education.
In the South Korea, a lot of people including students and parents are so much focusing on the education.
They think study is the only way that we can succeed, and they don't look at different ways.
They think the right way is study, but I think its not true.
Yea, a lot of people who learned and know a lot of knowledge succeeded very easly.
But they know only important knowledge, and they succeded, but we are trying to study more.
We need just few knowledge, not the all knowledge that human knows.
So I think goverment of South Korea has to focus to the education that study is not the all of our entire life.
If it does it, a lot of people will get a lot of jobs, and the economy of the South Korea will be improved.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi John!

Governments in emerging economies have, over the decades, tried many different policy agendas to stimulate development, accelerate growth, alleviate poverty, and achieve any number of other goals to mixed success. Nowadays, the urgent problem is regarding the pandemic. They work really hard on how to improve their country and their people as well. Your ideas are great. Thanks for sharing. :) 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon.

I think nowadays, the goverment of South Korea is so much focusing on the education.
>> I think nowadays, the government of South Korea should focus more on education.

In the South Korea, a lot of people including students and parents are so much focusing on the education.
>> In South Korea, there are a lot of families focusing on education. 

They think study is the only way that we can succeed, and they don't look at different ways.
>> They think that education is the only way a person can be successful and there's no other way. 

They think the right way is study, but I think its not true.
>> They think the right way is to study, but I think it's not true.

Yea, a lot of people who learned and know a lot of knowledge succeeded very easly.
>> Indeed, there are a lot of people who become successful because they studied really hard. 

But they know only important knowledge, and they succeded, but we are trying to study more.
>> They think that success depends on a person's knowledge that's why we need to study more. 

We need just few knowledge, not the all knowledge that human knows.
>> We just need to know a few things not everything. 

So I think goverment of South Korea has to focus to the education that study is not the all of our entire life.
>> I think that the government of South Korea should change the stereotype education should not be the only thing we have to depend on when it comes to success. 

If it does it, a lot of people will get a lot of jobs, and the economy of the South Korea will be improved.
>> If this happens, a lot of people will get jobs and the economy of South Korea will improve. 

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
109066 You have been a very competent worker but how long do you want... À¯*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-02 598
109065 HOMEWORK : Where do you live? ¹Ú*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-02 1
109064 A meat ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-02 4
109063 Homework (296) ¹Ú*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-02 424
109062 today\'s homework ÀÓ*ÃÑ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-02 480
109061 homework of Wednesday ±è*±¸ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-02 463
109060 [05/31]Homework ¹Ú*¹ü ¿Ï·á 2021-06-02 4
109059 HOMEWORK ±è*¼º ¿Ï·á 2021-06-02 460
109058 What are some of your good habits? ÀÌ*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-02 382
109057 grammar ¼Õ*¸² ¿Ï·á 2021-06-02 830
109056 grammar ¼Õ*¸² ¿Ï·á 2021-06-02 501
109055 What is your favorite holiday? Why? ÇÏ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-02 429
109054 HOMEWORK ±è*¼º ¿Ï·á 2021-06-02 471
109053 My personality ÁÖ*³ª ¿Ï·á 2021-06-02 1
109052 Um...I don\'t know... ±è*¶û ¿Ï·á 2021-06-02 622
109051 Make cantences ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-06-02 498
109050 Homework {06/02} Â÷*ºó ¿Ï·á 2021-06-02 432
109049 Are you good at beating deadlines? ¹Ú*°æ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-02 403
109048 What are some of your good habits? ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-02 499
109047 Wednesday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-06-02 411

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04