¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Monday homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ·ù*¿ì
2021-08-30 207

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Q:Most people say the book is better than the movie. Is this true for you?
A:I think it is true for me.
Actually, movie has video and audio so most of people think that movie is better but if people watch movie for long time, then their eyes can be not good and it can be more like real so it can make people change, but even if people read books, their eyes are the same and most of books don't make people change.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello Paul!

Thank you for doing your homework. :)

I understand that English could be really difficult.

But it only takes faith and confidence in yourself to perfect it.

You are a smart person and I know that with constant practice you will do great¡¦ ^_^

Xoxo,

T. Christina ^^

Here are my corrections for you:


I think it is true for me.

>> CORRECT!
Actually, movie has video and audio so most of people think that movie is better 

>> Actually, a movie has a video and audio so most people think that a movie is better.

but if people watch movie for long time, then their eyes can be not good and it can be more like real so it can make people change, 

>> But if people watch a movie for a long time, then it won't be good for their eyes and the movie can be realistic so it can make people change, 

but even if people read books, their eyes are the same and most of books don't make people change.

>> If people read books, their eyes will stay in the same condition and most books will not make people change.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
111192 What are the important things to consider when applying for a... ye*nhi ¿Ï·á 2021-08-24 2
111191 The pros and cons of studying at home are¡¦ ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2021-08-24 336
111190 Homework ½É*»ó ¿Ï·á 2021-08-24 174
111189 Fill in the blanks ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-08-24 183
111188 ¼÷Á¦ ±è*ºñ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-24 174
111187 Can you be happy if you are poor? ³ë*ÀÌ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-24 1
111186 In your opinion, what are the pros and cons of studying at home? ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-24 187
111185 Rainy day Á¤*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-24 205
111184 How old are you? ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-24 1
111183 Tuesday Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-08-24 171
111182 Homework Àü*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-08-24 136
111181 Nowadays employment options are changing and employees cannot... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-24 197
111180 If you were a medical student during the time of the pandemic,... Á¤*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-08-24 156
111179 17th homewokr Á¤*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-24 3
111178 Homework °­*¸² ¿Ï·á 2021-08-24 2
111177 Writing task: What are the best ways to make a good first... Á¶*¾Ö ¿Ï·á 2021-08-24 2
111176 Things for School ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-08-24 167
111175 e-mail correction ¹Ú*±¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-24 3
111174 Do you think you will live until a ripe old age? Why or why not? ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-24 0
111173 Homework À±*ÀÓ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-24 145

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04