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영작교정 게시판

영어 말하기와 쓰기를 동시에 잡는다!

자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
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담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

I prefer desert

작성자: 김*우
2021-10-25 757

회원님의 영작문

If I have to go to one place, I'll go to desert. There are two reasons, first I can get salt easily. There are not any way to get salt in rainforest. (or it's hard.) Second, there(desert) are few harmful animals and diseases. In rainforest, there are too many insects and diseases.

Diary: These weekend, I played soccer with my friends. My friend Choi sun introduced me to his friends. Frankly I know most of them. But since I didn't close with them, so I decided to be closed with them by playing soccer with them. So, the match of soccer was started. I was defender because I'm not good at attacking and defensing goalpost. Though I defensed most of attack, but because of my mistake opposing team scored. Anyway, I was very exited it and I could be closed with them because of this game.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hi, Daniel! Thanks for doing your homework. It is well-organized and easy to understand. Keep it up! 


- Teacher Debbie

If I have to go to one place, I'll go to desert. 
>> If I had to go to one place, I would go to a desert.

There are two reasons, first I can get salt easily. 
>> There are two reasons. First, I can get salt easily.

There are not any way to get salt in rainforest. (or it's hard.) 
>> There aren't any ways to get salt from a rainforest. 

Second, there(desert) are few harmful animals and diseases. 
>> Second, there are few harmful animals and diseases in deserts.

In rainforest, there are too many insects and diseases.
>> In rainforests, there are too many insects and diseases.


Diary: 

These weekend, I played soccer with my friends. 
>> I played soccer with my friends last weekend.

My friend Choi sun introduced me to his friends. 
>> My friend Choi Sun introduced me to his friends.

Frankly I know most of them. 
>> Actually, I already knew most of them.

But since I didn't close with them, so I decided to be closed with them by playing soccer with them.
>> However, since I am not close to them, I decided to be close to them by playing soccer with them.

So, the match of soccer was started. 
>> The soccer match started.

I was defender because I'm not good at attacking and defensing goalpost.
>> I was the defender because I'm not good at attacking and defending the goal post.

 Though I defensed most of attack, but because of my mistake opposing team scored. 
>> Though I defended most of the attacks, the opposing team scored because of my mistake.

Anyway, I was very exited it and I could be closed with them because of this game.
>> Anyway, I was very happy that day because I could be close to them because of this game.

I think you really had a good time with your new friends last weekend, Daniel. I hope you could spend more time getting to know them. 
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