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담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

Funeral Sermon 1

작성자: 류*선
2021-12-07 170

회원님의 영작문

My name is Han Yi, and I am the pastor at Henderson UMC. On behalf of the family, I would like to welcome you as we have gathered here together today to remember Gordon Bucky Newsome.
Thank you for being here today. Your presence today is an affirmation of your love and support for Bucky’s family. Although they may not remember every word shared today, they will remember your presence here for the rest of their lives.

It has been good to sit down with the bucky family to hear about [his/her] life. We are going to hear Bucky’s personal details from Mark Newsome later.

It is never easy to lose a loved one. So this afternoon, in the few moments that we have together I want us to turn our hearts towards God who is the giver of all comfort and the restorer of our souls.
We all know and experience the preposition, “Life is hard.” Yes, life is hard. We struggle with pain, illness, and the grief of losing loved ones. Our lives on this earth are hard and painful.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

You used good expressions, Han! Thank you for posting it here!-Faith-
My name is Han Yi, and I am the pastor at Henderson UMC. 
On behalf of the family, I would like to welcome you as we have gathered here together today to remember Gordon Bucky Newsome.
>> On behalf of the family, I would like to warmly welcome you as we have gathered here together today to remember our beloved brother Gordon Bucky Newsome.
OR On behalf of the grieving family, I would like to begin by thanking everyone that joins us here today to commit the mortal remains of our beloved brother, Gordon Bucky Newsome, to his final resting place.
Thank you for being here today. 
>> CORRECT
OR We are deeply grateful to all of you!
Your presence today is an affirmation of your love and support for Bucky’s family. 
>> CORRECT
OR Thank you for sharing your time and love in the celebration of Bucky’s life.
OR He would have been so honoured and humbled by all the love of his family and friends in this church today that are here to celebrate his life.
Although they may not remember every word shared today, they will remember your presence here for the rest of their lives.
>> CORRECT
It has been good to sit down with the bucky family to hear about [his/her] life. 
>> CORRECT
OR It's a privileged to be part of this service of remembrance.
We are going to hear Bucky’s personal details from Mark Newsome later.
>> We are going to hear more about Bucky’s personal life from Mark Newsome later.
It is never easy to lose a loved one. 
>> I can't imagine the pain but I know it is never easy to lose a loved one.
So this afternoon, in the few moments that we have together I want us to turn our hearts towards God who is the giver of all comfort and the restorer of our souls.
>> So this afternoon, in this short moment that we have together, I want us to turn our hearts towards God who is the Giver of all comforts and the Restorer of our souls.
We all know and experience the preposition, “Life is hard.” 
>> We all know and experience the proposition, “Life is hard.”
Yes, life is hard. 
>> CORRECT
OR Indeed, life is hard!
We struggle with pain, illness, and the grief of losing loved ones. 
>> CORRECT
OR We wrestle with trials and cries of woe when losing our dear ones in life.
Our lives on this earth are hard and painful.
>> Our life on this earth is hard and painful.
OR That's because life is a constant battle.
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