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영작교정 게시판

영어 말하기와 쓰기를 동시에 잡는다!

자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
회원님들께 무료로 제공해드리는 부가 서비스로, 전문 분야를 제외한 자유 주제
또는 강사님이 내주시는 과제를 회원님께서 영어로 작성해주시면,
담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

I\'m doing my homework...^^

작성자: 박*형
2022-02-11 1554

회원님의 영작문

What do you think are the good and bad effects of growing up in poverty?

Nowaday, Many apartments with having a lot of amenities have
been building in this city. whenever I see the new apartments, I consider what I move to the apartments which are very high and expensive. And sometimes I asked my sons if you want to move to the apartment they made lately. They answered " I don't care" And they also said "I am so happy now."
Actually, children don't know if they are poor or not. Even if their parents are poor, they are not that. But their parents have to effort to teach how to earn money. Especially, how to invest their salary. And What job is good for their future. We have to say that depend on how many books you read, your future will change.
for one year ago, my second son as closing the book said many good men who is very famous in history in this book lived in poverty. So he smiled I will be a great person.:)
I don't know if it is good answer or not. But...^^

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hello Miss Rachel!

I am really super thankful that you consistently answer the homework! This is good because it is an additional practice for you especially because out mobile class time is so short. Thank you for sharing some special moments with your son~ That was so precious. I do believe that people from poverty have a strong determination and has many goals in life.

Also you gave a very good and touching answer. Thank you~

Keep it up!
-Teacher Violet

Nowaday, Many apartments with having a lot of amenities have been building in this city. 
>> Nowadays, many apartments with a lot of amenities are being built in this city.

whenever I see the new apartments, I consider what I move to the apartments which are very high and expensive. 
>> Whenever I see the new apartments, I consider moving to the ones which are very high and expensive.

And sometimes I asked my sons if you want to move to the apartment they made lately. 
>> And sometimes, I ask my sons if they want to move into the apartments made lately.

They answered " I don't care" And they also said "I am so happy now."
>> They answered " I don't care" and they also said "I am so happy now."

Actually, children don't know if they are poor or not. 
>> CORRECT!

Even if their parents are poor, they are not that. 
>> Even if their parents are poor, they are not.

But their parents have to effort to teach how to earn money. Especially, how to invest their salary. And What job is good for their future. 
>> But their parents have to make an effort to teach them how to earn money, especially how to invest their salary and what job is good for their future.

We have to say that depend on how many books you read, your future will change.
>> We have to say that the future will change depending on the number of books you read.

for one year ago, my second son as closing the book said many good men who is very famous in history in this book lived in poverty. 
>> One year ago, my second son said, while closing the book, "Many good and famous men in histories in this book lived in poverty".

So he smiled I will be a great person.:)
>> So he smiled and said "I will be a great person".

I don't know if it is good answer or not. But...^^
>> CORRECT!! (It is a great answer!)
번호 제목 글쓴이 공개 상태 등록일 조회수
116092 I\'m positive for my future 김*우 완료 2022-02-04 534
116091 Homework 김*윤 완료 2022-02-04 1384
116090 homework 김*연 완료 2022-02-04 595
116089 Homework (Feb 3th, 2022) 남*승 완료 2022-02-04 1550
116088 homework 감*우 완료 2022-02-04 1
116087 My Homework 강*우 완료 2022-02-04 637
116086 How would you describe the difference between a vice and an... 김*윤 완료 2022-02-04 540
116085 Homework 김*혁 완료 2022-02-04 1515
116084 What are you looking forward to this 2022 and why? 류*주 완료 2022-02-04 1172
116083 Friday homework 류*우 완료 2022-02-04 730
116082 Home work 김*주 완료 2022-02-04 1811
116081 Writing correction 김*영 완료 2022-02-04 963
116080 Writing correction 김*영 완료 2022-02-04 920
116079 Where is your favorite restaurant and why? 양*희 완료 2022-02-04 2
116078 Homework 강*선 완료 2022-02-04 1896
116077 My appearance 민*정 완료 2022-02-04 5
116076 LIving WIth Someone 최*우 완료 2022-02-04 958
116075 Homework 권*미 완료 2022-02-04 1
116074 What do you think should be done to improve living conditions in... 김*원 완료 2022-02-04 0
116073 Homework 박*은 완료 2022-02-04 1

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전문 분야를 제외한 회원님이 직접 작성한 글만
첨삭이 가능하며,

올려주신 글의 강사님 첨삭은 24시간 이내에
완료 되는 것을 원칙으로 하고 있습니다.
03
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04

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