¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Writing Task(Feb 27th, 2022)

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ³²*½Â
2022-03-01 1198

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Bungee jumping?>>
I do hate bungee jumping.
I loved to ride the rides at the amusement park.
I wrote in past tense ¡°LOVED¡±
15 years ago, when I was riding a Viking ride. I remember the moment vividly. When the Viking started going up, swinging back and forth, for the first twenty, thirty second I enjoyed it very much. But I suddenly felt a great pain in my chest and could hardly breath. And my eye sight went slowly and I passe out since. When I opened my eyes, I noticed my friends who I went with were all beside me, some talking to the operator of the ride and some making phone calls to 119. But a few minutes later, I passe out again. When I opened my eyes again, I found myself on the bed transported by an ambulance. I was diagnosed with cardiac arrhythmia. The doctor asked me to ride the Viking ride again with an equipment on my chest so that it could record every symptom of my heart during riding and he could analyse the reaction of my heart with the data. I replied ¡°Are you insane?¡±

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, U Seung!

Wow! That's totally an insane thing to ask a weird question from a doctor. I guess, I understand why wouldn't try it. It's really not safe for you to try extreme sports activities due to your condition. Just make sure to keep yourself safe and healthy all the time. Let go of all your worries because it's also not good for your health. Just enjoy life and what it gives you.

Thank you for sharing and have a nice day! 

~T. Roanne ^_^
===============================================
I do hate bungee jumping.
>> Correct! 
I loved to ride the rides at the amusement park.
>> Correct! 
I wrote in past tense ¡°LOVED¡±
>> Correct! 
15 years ago, when I was riding a Viking ride. I remember the moment vividly. 
>> Correct! 
When the Viking started going up, swinging back and forth, for the first twenty, thirty second I enjoyed it very much. 
>> Correct! 
But I suddenly felt a great pain in my chest and could hardly breath. 
>> Correct! 
And my eye sight went slowly and I passe out since. 
>> And my eyesight went slowly and I have passed out from. 
When I opened my eyes, I noticed my friends who I went with were all beside me, some talking to the operator of the ride and some making phone calls to 119. 
>> Correct! 
But a few minutes later, I passe out again. 
>> But a few minutes later, I passed out again. 
When I opened my eyes again, I found myself on the bed transported by an ambulance. 
>> Correct! 
I was diagnosed with cardiac arrhythmia. 
>> Correct! 
The doctor asked me to ride the Viking ride again with an equipment on my chest so that it could record every symptom of my heart during riding and he could analyse the reaction of my heart with the data. 
>> The doctor asked me to ride the Viking ride again with an equipment on my chest so that it could record every symptom of my heart during riding and he could analyze the reaction of my heart with the data. 
I replied ¡°Are you insane?¡±
>> Correct! 



¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
115606 What advice would you give someone who is very busy? ¹é*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-01-14 594
115605 homework °¨*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-01-14 1
115604 If you could travel back in time, where would you go? ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-01-14 0
115603 If you could travel back in time, where would you go? ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-01-14 616
115602 Friday homeowrk ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-01-14 838
115601 Homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-01-14 0
115600 What makes a pleasant shopping experience? ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-01-14 846
115599 Homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-01-14 2
115598 Homework °­*¼± ¿Ï·á 2022-01-14 518
115597 If you knew your friend\'s husband or wife was cheating on... ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-01-14 604
115596 Do you think learning how to play an instrument is important?... ±è*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-01-14 1
115595 Do you prefer eating out to cooking meal at home? Why or why not? Á¤*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-01-14 866
115594 What do you think you are best at? ±Ý*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-01-14 1353
115593 Homework ¿À*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-01-14 834
115592 Why should we eat healthy? ÁÖ*¼® ¿Ï·á 2022-01-14 1
115591 Why I don\'t want to be a teacher. ±è*¼º ¿Ï·á 2022-01-14 511
115590 Why I like the stars than the moon. ±è*¼º ¿Ï·á 2022-01-14 595
115589 Essay (Jan 14th, 2022) ³²*½Â ¿Ï·á 2022-01-14 743
115588 How do you show love for your country? ÇÑ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-01-14 1023
115587 Homework ÀÌ*ºó ¿Ï·á 2022-01-14 705

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04