¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

favorite place in my city

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*¿µ
2022-06-20 1353

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

My favorite place in my city is my home! because i am lazy to go out so i almost stay at home. while i am home i can study,play phone,eat some foods etc, i can do many kinds of things. and these days going out is little bit dangerous because of pandemic. so i think my favorite place in my city is my home.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Chloe!  

Yes, there is no place like home. We can be ourselves when we are at our house. We are also be surrounded by that people that we love. 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your first homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon

My favorite place in my city is my home! because i am lazy to go out so i almost stay at home. 
>> My favorite place in my city is my home because I am lazy to go out. I usually just stay at home.. 

while i am home i can study,play phone,eat some foods etc, i can do many kinds of things. 
>> When I am home, I can play, study, use my phone and eat some food. I can do many things here. 

and these days going out is little bit dangerous because of pandemic. so i think my favorite place in my city is my home.
>> And these days, going out is a little bit dangerous because of the pandemic so I think that my favorite place in my city is my home. 
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
119666 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-07 528
119665 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-07 541
119664 Homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-06-07 2
119663 homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-06-07 443
119662 homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-06-07 639
119661 homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-06-07 659
119660 homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-06-07 635
119659 Expensive gift ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-07 591
119658 About season ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-06-07 2
119657 homewokr ÀÌ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-06-07 539
119656 homework ¿ø*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-07 615
119655 Do you think that you should change your eating habits? Why or... ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-07 533
119654 homework ÃÖ*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-06-07 466
119653 Tuesday Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-06-07 568
119652 homework ÃÖ*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-06-07 708
119651 What are some superstitions in your country? Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-07 748
119650 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-06-07 0
119649 Homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-06-07 1
119648 Is there a food that you will never eat? ¹Ú*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-07 767
119647 Why do you think space renovations are necessary? ¹Ú*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-07 641

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04