무료 레벨테스트 받고 강사평가 남기면 1,OOO원 쿠폰 즉시 적립!

혹시 사이트에선 찾지 못한 궁금한 점이 있으세요?
남겨주신 이메일을 통해 답변 드리겠습니다.

문의하신 내용이 문자로 발송되오니
연락처를 남겨주세요.
업무시간 월~금 오전9시~오후6시
(점심시간 낮12시~오후1시)

영작교정 게시판

영어 말하기와 쓰기를 동시에 잡는다!

자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
회원님들께 무료로 제공해드리는 부가 서비스로, 전문 분야를 제외한 자유 주제
또는 강사님이 내주시는 과제를 회원님께서 영어로 작성해주시면,
담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

What is your opinion about the growing number of lonely deaths in your country? What do you think is

작성자: 황*하
2023-01-13 1032

회원님의 영작문

Korea became one of the advanced countries few years ago, but there are still too many people in poverty. They live in a tiny house which is not equipped well. They use shared bathroom and they don't have enough space to get kitchen room. Most people don't have family members so nobody knows, if they are sick or suddenly die at home. Although, there is a wellfare program wich is provided by regional government, many people couldn't get benifits from the governmental authority because of the budget and man power. It is related with aging problem. Koreans need to pay national pention according to their income every month, and they can receive it when they turn to 65 years old whereas, most people retire at 60 years old. This is the major problem because people have to live without any income for 5 years from their retirement, if they don't have private pension. I think that it has to be reviewed and need to revise. In addition, house price is main cause of lonely death.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Good day, Sir Hwang!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille

Korea became one of the advanced countries few years ago, but there are still too many people in poverty.
>> CORRECT! 
OR >> Korea became one of the advanced countries few years ago, but there are still too many people facing poverty.
They live in a tiny house which is not equipped well. 
>> CORRECT! 
OR >> They live in tiny houses that aren't fully equipped.
They use shared bathroom and they don't have enough space to get kitchen room. 
>> They use shared bathrooms and they don't have enough space to get a kitchen. 
Most people don't have family members so nobody knows, if they are sick or suddenly die at home.
>> CORRECT! 
Although, there is a wellfare program wich is provided by regional government, many people couldn't get benifits from the governmental authority because of the budget and man power. 
>> Although, there is a welfares' program which is provided by regional government, many people couldn't get benefits from the governmental authority because of the budget and man power. 
It is related with aging problem. 
>> It is related to aging problem. 
Koreans need to pay national pention according to their income every month, and they can receive it when they turn to 65 years old whereas, most people retire at 60 years old. 
>> Koreans need to pay national pension according to their income every month, and they can receive it when they turn to 65 years old whereas, most people retire at 60 years old. 
This is the major problem because people have to live without any income for 5 years from their retirement, if they don't have private pension. 
>> CORRECT! 
I think that it has to be reviewed and need to revise. 
>> I think that it has to be reviewed and need to be revised. 
In addition, house price is main cause of lonely death.
>> CORRECT! 

번호 제목 글쓴이 공개 상태 등록일 조회수
124698 Homework 이*경 완료 2023-01-07 1090
124697 Homework 이*경 완료 2023-01-07 897
124696 Homework 이*경 완료 2023-01-07 1157
124695 The request 민*정 완료 2023-01-07 1
124694 What is your opinion about Pre-marital sex? 신*섭 완료 2023-01-07 1820
124693 What are some other popular winter activities in your country? 김*경 완료 2023-01-07 1257
124692 Homework 김*우 완료 2023-01-06 945
124691 The weekend!! 김*윤 완료 2023-01-06 1181
124690 Which greeting kind of annoys you? 장*규 완료 2023-01-06 950
124689 Homework 권*미 완료 2023-01-06 0
124688 My favorite music type. 박*별 완료 2023-01-06 1186
124687 Weekends in some countries are Fridays and Saturdays, in other... 태*서 완료 2023-01-06 1405
124686 Homework 박*민 완료 2023-01-06 1
124685 homework 정*호 완료 2023-01-06 1
124684 I miss 2022… 김*윤 완료 2023-01-06 1556
124683 What are the most important questions to ask before buying a... 임*윤 완료 2023-01-06 1074
124682 Have you ever given first aid to someone? What happened? 전*연 완료 2023-01-06 2
124681 The reason that I prefer traditional education 김*우 완료 2023-01-06 2
124680 homework 박*은 완료 2023-01-06 1
124679 Do you ever feel anxiety when meeting a deadline? 전*연 완료 2023-01-06 3

HOW TO USE IT?

[마이페이지 > 수업 내용 보기 > 학습 캘린더 > 영작교정 버튼 클릭]

수업 횟수만큼 영작교정 게시판이 생성되며,
지난 날짜에도 게시 할 수 있습니다.

주5회 수업 : 월 20회 이용 가능
주3회 수업 : 월 12회 이용 가능
주2회 수업 : 월 08회 이용 가능
01
교정 내용은 최대 1,000byte까지 올릴 수 있습니다.

첨부 파일은 원활한 첨삭을 위한 참고자료로 사용될 뿐,
파일에 대한 첨삭은 불가능 합니다.

업로드 가능한 첨부 파일은 최대 2mb까지이며,
첨부 할 수 있는 파일 형식은 다음과 같습니다.

문서 - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
이미지 - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
전문 분야를 제외한 회원님이 직접 작성한 글만
첨삭이 가능하며,

올려주신 글의 강사님 첨삭은 24시간 이내에
완료 되는 것을 원칙으로 하고 있습니다.
03
하루 게시 가능한 글은 3회까지 이며,
종료된 수업의 영작교정 게시판은
이용이 어려운 점 양해 부탁 드립니다.
04

와이즈에듀케이션아이(주) 사이트명: 파워잉글리쉬 대표이사 전상현
사업자등록번호: 217-81-44736 통신판매신고번호: 2014-서울도봉-0233호
서울본사: 서울시 노원구 한글비석로 245 두타빌 B동 7층 713호
대표번호 1688-8672 개인정보관리 책임자: 안희영 [powerenglish@pweng.net]