¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

food

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±Ç*Èñ
2023-09-01 2647

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I worry about our products and food including sea food.

But the reason is not only the treated water but also environment destruction.

We are eating already many contaminated food, processed food and instant food that harm to the body.

People blame the treated wate more than necessary.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello there, Ms. Lily!
How have you been?
Thank you that despite being busy, you still find ways to answer the question that I gave you because our class time is really limited and we don't get a chance to discuss more about the topic. 
See you later!
Aki~

I worry about our products and food including sea food.
>>> CORRECT!

But the reason is not only the treated water but also environment destruction.
>>> CORRECT!

We are eating already many contaminated food, processed food and instant food that harm to the body.
>>> We are eating already many contaminated food, processed food and instant food that harm to the body.

People blame the treated water more than necessary.
>>> CORRECT!

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
130482 Do you find it easier to forgive a friend or a family member... ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-08-25 1
130481 Homework ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-08-24 2842
130480 Some diets seem quite strange. What¡¯s the weirdest diet you... Á¶*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-08-24 0
130479 homework 08.24 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2023-08-24 2968
130478 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-08-24 5345
130477 What do you think is the most interesting nonliving thing your... ¿À*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-24 1
130476 Would you rather ride a bicycle or go roller skating? ¼Û*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-08-24 3271
130475 How does curiosity help in learning? È«*±â ¿Ï·á 2023-08-24 3859
130474 What do you like to eat for breakfast? ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-08-24 2656
130473 Homework ±è* ¿Ï·á 2023-08-24 0
130472 Homework ±è* ¿Ï·á 2023-08-24 0
130471 Homework ±è*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-24 4057
130470 What can you cook? ±¸*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-08-24 3030
130469 What kinds of pants do you like wearing? ±¸*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-08-24 2863
130468 Homework ½Å*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-24 4388
130467 Homework ½Å*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-24 4109
130466 Write about your most interesting travel experience. Where did... ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2023-08-24 0
130465 8/9 homework °­*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-24 0
130464 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-24 3
130463 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-08-24 4248

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04