¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

harass

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±Ç*Èñ
2023-09-26 3294

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

In traditional times in Korea, family culture was very conservative, strict and patriarchal.

Parents and adult had priviledge of teaching their children strictly even with physical punishment.

Social norms didn't respect the human rigft of children and women.

Even parents harass and abuse their children, it was regarded as education.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good morning, Ms., Lily!
We are in the same boat! People in the past were more focused on punishment and being strict. All countries have experienced a very difficult life and our parents have prepared us by letting us undergo punishment because they believe that through hardships we can face the challenges of the world in a courageous and strong way.
Talk to you later!
Aki~

In traditional times in Korea, family culture was very conservative, strict, and patriarchal.
>>> CORRECT!

Parents and adult had priviledge of teaching their children strictly even with physical punishment.
>>> Parents and adults had the privilege of teaching their children strictly even with physical punishment.

Social norms didn't respect the human rights of children and women.
>>>  CORRECT!

Even parents harass and abuse their children, it was regarded as education.
>>> Even if parents harassed and abused their children, it was regarded as education.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
130470 What can you cook? ±¸*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-08-24 3259
130469 What kinds of pants do you like wearing? ±¸*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-08-24 3130
130468 Homework ½Å*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-24 4523
130467 Homework ½Å*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-24 4316
130466 Write about your most interesting travel experience. Where did... ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2023-08-24 0
130465 8/9 homework °­*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-24 0
130464 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-24 3
130463 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-08-24 4644
130462 The reason why car is kept from entering to center of city ¼º*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-24 4510
130461 Top of job in the world ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-24 3440
130460 Writing Exercise: Describe a situation where you had to adapt to... ¼­*ÅÃ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-24 3829
130459 What thing\'s in your home couldn\'t you live without? ¹Ú*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-24 3807
130458 Do you believe that first impression lasts? ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-24 4408
130457 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-08-24 0
130456 WRITING TASK: Have you ever been feeling homesick? How did you... ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-08-24 3
130455 What is the biggest change you\'d like to make to your life? ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-24 3740
130454 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-08-24 0
130453 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-08-24 0
130452 money or beauty °­*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-24 1
130451 Appearance ¼º*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-24 3329

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04