¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*´Ô
2024-12-17 1498

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

It is kind of disease which sex chromosome's position was wrong.
If they behave against gender, it can be caused another disease.
Person's sprit is high position than desire of their body.
So they have to control their desires if it can ruin other's life.
Therefore I will not support their behavior.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello Ms. Sunny!
I understand your point. While the world is normalizing this phenomenon, I would still stand by my principle. I respect these minority groups but sorry to say that I don't agree with their practices and behavior especially if the society is involved. 
Thank you for this homework and I appreciate your effort to express yourself in English.
Aki~

It is kind of disease which sex chromosome's position was wrong.
>>> It is a kind of disease in which the sex chromosome's position is wrong.

If they behave against gender, it can be caused another disease.
>>> If they behave against their gender, it can cause another disease.

Person's sprit is high position than desire of their body.
>>> A person's spirit is higher than the desire of their body.

So they have to control their desires if it can ruin other's life.
>>> So they have to control their desires if they can ruin other's lives.

Therefore I will not support their behavior.
>>> CORRECT!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
140836 Appearance important Á¤*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-06 7
140835 Should beauty standards include people of all shapes, sizes, and... ½Å*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-11-06 1841
140834 Homework ±è*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-11-06 2086
140833 Introduce myself Á¤*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-06 2061
140832 Cats and dogs are the most common types of pets. What are some... ¿À*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2024-11-06 2323
140831 Some pieces of art sell for millions of dollars. Why are some... ¿À*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2024-11-06 2238
140830 What was the hardest part about learning English? ÀÌ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-06 1
140829 How does kindness show up in small, everyday ways? ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-11-06 1901
140828 What do you want to include in your ideal fitness program? ±è*¸° ¿Ï·á 2024-11-06 2366
140827 My hobby Á¶*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-11-06 1803
140826 What part does luck play in success? ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-11-06 2031
140825 Can excessive use of social media have the opposite effect on... ¾È*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-11-06 1960
140824 Home work for Monday ±è*¿ë ¿Ï·á 2024-11-06 1630
140823 04nov2024_homework ±è*¶ó ¿Ï·á 2024-11-06 2268
140822 If you could ask your palm reader one specific question about... ÀÓ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-11-06 2390
140821 cheap ways to stay healthy ¾ç*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-06 2401
140820 Homework ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-11-06 2360
140819 Mold in my walk-in closet ±¸*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-06 1
140818 Page 44. ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-11-06 1
140817 HOMEWORK ¾ç*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-06 2684

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04