¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What is the best food to eat when you are sick?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÇÑ*¿¬
2025-01-21 1207

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

The rice porridge is the best food to eat when I am sick.
Because I can easily eat when I don't want to eat anything.
Also, It is easy to make with a rice and water.
And the sweet food like chocolate and jelly are also the best food to eat when I am sick.
It makes me powerful and happy.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello Nicole!
You did so well! I'm so proud of your writing! Keep up the good job and take note of the corrections as well so you can improve more. Great writing! See you on Thursday!
~~Teacher Kate 

The rice porridge is the best food to eat when I am sick.
>>CORRECT!
Because I can easily eat when I don't want to eat anything.
>>Because I can eat it easily, even when I don¡¯t feel like eating anything.
Also, It is easy to make with a rice and water.
>>It is also simple to make with just rice and water.
And the sweet food like chocolate and jelly are also the best food to eat when I am sick.
>>Sweet foods like chocolate and jelly are also great to eat when I am sick. 
It makes me powerful and happy.
>>CORRECT!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
141403 ¡°How My Daily Routine Reflects My Personal Growth¡± ³ë*ö ¿Ï·á 2024-12-09 1674
141402 Please change difficult words to easy words and correct them so... ÀÌ*ÀÎ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-09 1536
141401 Please change difficult words to easy words and correct them so... ÀÌ*ÀÎ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-09 1940
141400 Please change difficult words to easy words and correct them so... ÀÌ*ÀÎ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-09 1688
141399 homework ÀÌ*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-09 2
141398 Is there any form of greeting you want to change? Explain¡£ ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-09 2
141397 The government should help people Á¤*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-09 3
141396 What do you like to do every day? ÀÌ*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-09 2579
141395 Do you enjoy observing what other people are doing? ÀÌ*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-09 1800
141394 Do you usually have coffee, tea, or something else with your... ÀÌ*¹ü ¿Ï·á 2024-12-08 7
141393 Why do you think that most people take a nap in the middle of... Â÷*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-08 1758
141392 Write about your most memorable Friday. Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-12-08 1885
141391 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-12-08 1
141390 Please change difficult words to easy words and correct them so... ÀÌ*ÀÎ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-08 1940
141389 Please change difficult words to easy words and correct them so... ÀÌ*ÀÎ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-08 1747
141388 Please change difficult words to easy words and correct them so... ÀÌ*ÀÎ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-08 1658
141387 Homework ±è*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-12-08 1760
141386 Homework ±è*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-12-08 1817
141385 What strategies do you usually employ when everything feels like... ±è*¸° ¿Ï·á 2024-12-08 1882
141384 How could art be appreciated and enjoyed by more people? ±è*¸° ¿Ï·á 2024-12-08 1703

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04