¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What do you think makes a visitor feel welcome? Explain.

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Á¶*¼ö
2025-06-19 179

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

It is important to make acquaintances or guests feel comfortable and welcome when they visit your home. There may be various ways to satisfy visitors. However, one of the most essential elements is heartfelt sincerity. Let's suppose that you are invited to someone's home. Even though you are served delicious food and given a perfect room for the night, you might still want to leave if the host displays unpleasant behavior such as being unkind and emotionally distant. Similarly, imagine that you are traveling to new places or countries. Although those attractions may fall short of your expectations and you are exposed to some uncomfortable situations, you may still remember the experience positively for a long time, if people there kindly welcome you and leave a positive impression. In conclusion, touching someone's heart is not about offering material things, but about showing genuine kindness.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Isaac!
There is a better way to express one idea in this composition.
Please review.
We can discuss later in class.
You did well again today.^^
~~ Teacher Sharon
It is important to make acquaintances or guests feel comfortable and welcome when they visit your home. 
>> Correct
There may be various ways to satisfy visitors. 
>> There may be various ways to do that.
However, one of the most essential elements is heartfelt sincerity. 
>> Correct
Let's suppose that you are invited to someone's home. 
>> Correct
Even though you are served delicious food and given a perfect room for the night, you might still want to leave if the host displays unpleasant behavior such as being unkind and emotionally distant. 
>> Correct
Similarly, imagine that you are traveling to new places or countries. 
>> Correct
Although those attractions may fall short of your expectations and you are exposed to some uncomfortable situations, you may still remember the experience positively for a long time, if people there kindly welcome you and leave a positive impression. 
>> Correct
In conclusion, touching someone's heart is not about offering material things, but about showing genuine kindness.
>> Correct
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
144094 In what ways has technology changed how your family interacts? ÀÓ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2025-05-14 705
144093 The homework for 14th May. Á¶*È£ ¿Ï·á 2025-05-14 614
144092 Homework for today ¾ö*¸° ¿Ï·á 2025-05-14 0
144091 Homework ÀÌ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2025-05-14 588
144090 Homework. ¼Û*Áø ¿Ï·á 2025-05-14 1
144089 Do you believe that a home reflects a person\'s identiy,... ¹Ú*È£ ¿Ï·á 2025-05-14 628
144088 Homework ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2025-05-14 605
144087 Jeny! ¹Ú*¿í ¿Ï·á 2025-05-14 651
144086 ¤Ó Á¶*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2025-05-14 616
144085 I prepare to set my CEO\'s interview with journalists ÀÌ*Çü ¿Ï·á 2025-05-14 706
144084 what is your idea of a perfect weekend? ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2025-05-14 624
144083 D3 essay homework ±è*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2025-05-14 585
144082 Homework ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2025-05-14 1
144081 . ±è*ÀÎ ¿Ï·á 2025-05-14 601
144080 Do we need to work to maintain friendships? ¿©*Âù ¿Ï·á 2025-05-13 0
144079 homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2025-05-13 1
144078 Are there pickpockets in your country? Write about pickpocketing... Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2025-05-13 535
144077 What do you think of every time you visit the dentist? Â÷*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2025-05-13 586
144076 Write about your trip to Seoul during the long holiday. Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2025-05-13 634
144075 What\'s the most useful pet in the world? Why? Â÷*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2025-05-13 700

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04