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김순님/2025-05-20

회원님의 올려주신 영작문
I think family is the relationship which is like part of myself. I should endure them when they make me burden. But there might be the situation some happening can break my belief. I have to choice my life between family or alone. Friend is important too. They don't hurt me a lot better than family. They can agree with me and we can share emotion each other. But family is seriously important to me.
강사님의 첨삭교정 내용
Hi, Ms. Sunny!
Blood is thicker than water, and  a  friend is a loving one at all times, as stated in Proverbs 17:17. The proverb highlights the unwavering nature of a true friend, someone who provides support and love not only during pleasant times but also through difficult situations. This contrasts with a brother/sister, who is said to be born for a time of adversity, suggesting that while a brother/sister may be a source of support during tough times, a friend's love is constant
Great day ahead!
Aki~

I think family is the relationship which is like part of myself.
>>> I believe family is a relationship that feels like a part of me.
 
I should endure them when they make me burden.
>>> I should endure them when they give me a burden.
 
But there might be the situation some happening can break my belief.
>>> But there might be situations where something happening can break my belief.

I have to choice my life between family or alone.
>>> I have to choose between family and being alone.

Friend is important too.
>>> Friends are important too.

They don't hurt me a lot better than family.
>>> They don't hurt me as much as family.

They can agree with me and we can share emotion each other.
>>> They can agree with me, and we can share emotions.

But family is seriously important to me.
>> CORRECT!

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