I have gradually improved my shopping habits over the recent years. Until my early 20s, I had a tendency to impulsively purchase attractive items whenever I wanted to have them. Although this habit of buying something spontaneously and recklessly led to excessive expenses, I didn't realize the seriousness of the problem. At that time, I had never experienced my own income, so I lacked financial sense. However, in 2021, I received a monthly salary for the first time from Korean Airforce, which helped me realize the value of money and become more mature. I also felt sorry for my parents' previous support. After that, I started part-time jobs and came to embrace a habit of shopping only what I truly needed. Moreover, These days, I look for cheaper items rather than the best-performing ones, and I often seek out second-hand products or bargains.
Hi Isaac!
Please take note of the corrections below.
We will discuss them in class.
Try to keep them in mind for your future compositions.^^
~~ Teacher Sharon
I have gradually improved my shopping habits over the recent years.
>> Correct
Until my early 20s, I had a tendency to impulsively purchase attractive items whenever I wanted to have them.
>> Correct
Although this habit of buying something spontaneously and recklessly led to excessive expenses, I didn't realize the seriousness of the problem.
>> Correct
At that time, I had never experienced my own income, so I lacked financial sense.
>> At that time, I had never experienced earning my own income, so I lacked financial sense.
However, in 2021, I received a monthly salary for the first time from Korean Airforce, which helped me realize the value of money and become more mature.
>> However, in 2021, I received a monthly salary for the first time from the Korean Airforce, which helped me realize the value of money and become more mature.
I also felt sorry for my parents' previous support.
>> I also felt sorry because of my parents' previous support.
After that, I started part-time jobs and came to embrace a habit of shopping only what I truly needed.
>> After that, I started doing part-time jobs and I also came to embrace a habit of shopping only what I truly needed.
Moreover, These days, I look for cheaper items rather than the best-performing ones, and I often seek out second-hand products or bargains.
>> Moreover, these days, I look for cheaper items rather than the best-performing ones, and I often seek out second-hand products or bargains.