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It is negative development

김희원/2025-07-31

회원님의 올려주신 영작문
I think if people don't going outside it couldn't good health and met face of face in other person , therfore Don't go outside that is negative development
강사님의 첨삭교정 내용
Hi there UN! Thanks for doing your first homework! Your opinion is short but complete in thoughts. I just have revised for better grammar structure and word-order. Keep it up!
>>> TEACHER GEMMA
I think if people don't going outside it couldn't good health and met face of face in other person , therfore Don't go outside that is negative development.
REVISED VERSION:  I think if people don't go outside, it can negatively affect their health and reduce face-to-face interaction with others. Therefore, not going outside is a negative development.
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