¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

well I always try to manage a everyday for not to wast time

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: À¯*¿ì
2021-01-21 348

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I usually pick up the first work that is also important that day.
and deciding to order from important work to less important work is very important to me
because you would process many work or something you have how plan you have every day and every week

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hey, Jin. Your grammar is improving and I have to say I appreciate the effort you put into this homework. Well done! I just tweaked some of the sentences. Thank you once again and have a good night. ~Teacher Jane c",)


well I always try to manage a everyday for not to wast time
>> Well, I always try to manage not to waste time every day.

I usually pick up the first work that is also important that day.
>> I usually pick up the first work that is also the most important of that day.

and deciding to order from important work to less important work is very important to me
>> And deciding to put in order the most important work to the less important work is very important to me.

because you would process many work or something you have how plan you have every day and every week
>> Because if you would do a lot of work or something you have to plan every day and every week.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
104680 The food that I like to eat everyday and not get tired of. ±è*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-01-14 448
104679 Homework ¹Ú*¸® ¿Ï·á 2021-01-14 439
104678 When you are on the brink of giving up, what do you usually... ±è*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2021-01-14 399
104677 What is your goal in life? ±è*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-01-14 1
104676 What sport would you not want to try? ±è*¿¹ ¿Ï·á 2021-01-14 0
104675 Homework (203) ¹Ú*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-01-14 404
104674 Describe the first memory you have of going to school ÀÌ*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2021-01-14 317
104673 The services I care about before I go to the restaurant and the... Á¤*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-01-14 415
104672 Key to Live a Long and Healthy Life ±è*Áö ¿Ï·á 2021-01-14 605
104671 Dating application. ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-01-14 1
104670 (HW) If you could prepare a dish for a VIP, what would it be and... Á¤*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-01-14 366
104669 How important is freedom in society? What does freedom feel like? °­*¿¹ ¿Ï·á 2021-01-14 2
104668 Homework ±è*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2021-01-14 1
104667 If I were a musician, ÀÌ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-01-14 681
104666 Homework ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-01-14 345
104665 grammar ¼Õ*¸² ¿Ï·á 2021-01-14 617
104664 [1/12]/Homework ¹Ú*¹ü ¿Ï·á 2021-01-14 3
104663 Do you think that some businesses, such as travel agents, could... È«*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-01-14 2
104662 My family\'s value. ±è*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-01-14 341
104661 Homework °­*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2021-01-14 428

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04