¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*¾Æ
2021-01-29 353

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I agree to certain extent.
These day, people watch the news on the Internet instead of newspapers.
Also search on the Internet instead of magazines and they read e-books instead of paperbooks.
As it goes on, newspapers, paper books will disappear.
But it can't go away.
Because, they are traditional things that have been around since our ancestors.
Therefore, it is good to solve everything through the Internet, but sometimes it would be good to use traditional methods.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi there Eden~! ^^ I'm really sorry about what happened today. Anyway, I hope to see you on Monday~! ^^ Thank you for doing your best in your essays! Keep improving!
>>> TEACHER GEMMA 
I agree to certain extent.
>>> I agree to a certain extent.
These day, people watch the news on the Internet instead of newspapers.
>>> These days, people watch the news on the internet instead of reading newspapers.
Also search on the Internet instead of magazines and they read e-books instead of paperbooks.
>>> Also, they search on the internet instead of magazines and they read e-books instead of paper books.
As it goes on, newspapers, paper books will disappear.
>>> As it goes on, newspapers, paper books might disappear.
But it can't go away.
>>> CORRECT
Because, they are traditional things that have been around since our ancestors.
>>> Because, they are traditional things which have been around since our ancestors.
Therefore, it is good to solve everything through the internet, but sometimes it would be good to use traditional methods.
>>> CORRECT

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
105360 Homework0203 ±è*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-02-03 494
105359 Hm Àå*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-03 437
105358 The busiest city in my area Á¶*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-03 286
105357 essay , question Á¤*±³ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-03 511
105356 Last class homework ÀÓ*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-02-03 415
105355 HOMEWORK Á¤*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-03 0
105354 grammar ¼Õ*¸² ¿Ï·á 2021-02-03 407
105353 Wish vs. Hope ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-02-03 255
105352 Social distancing rules could be revised before Lunar New Year:... À¯*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-02-03 1
105351 first one is my essay, second is reading passage, third one is... Á¶*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-02-03 3
105350 How to help homeless people Á¶*½Å ¿Ï·á 2021-02-03 391
105349 My favorite precious stone is pearl. ±è*¶û ¿Ï·á 2021-02-03 303
105348 School official sentenced to 3 years in prison for leaking SAT... À¯*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-02-03 1
105347 Email correction(1) ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-03 0
105346 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-03 0
105345 I never love learning English... À¯*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-02-03 349
105344 well... we are not avoiding misunderstanding within the family À¯*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-02-03 722
105343 Thursday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-02-03 336
105342 HOMEWORK ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-03 327
105341 Child abuse ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-03 3

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04