¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*Á¤
2021-01-29 402

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Adults,especially parents,think
that the most worrying thing is the safety of their children
or whether their children are happy or not

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello, Lucia!
(^___^)//
Thank you so much for answering your homework.
Like what I've mention last time, proper punctuation is important when writing paragraphs.
Let's discuss this in class on Monday.
See you then!

__T. Mayleen :)


Adults,especially parents,think
that the most worrying thing is the safety of their children
or whether their children are happy or not
>>> Adults, especially parents, think that the biggest concern is their children's safety.
They also worry about their children's happiness.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
105224 My work 5 ÇÏ*³ª ¿Ï·á 2021-02-01 323
105223 My work 3 ÇÏ*³ª ¿Ï·á 2021-02-01 315
105222 My work 2 ÇÏ*³ª ¿Ï·á 2021-02-01 305
105221 My work ÇÏ*³ª ¿Ï·á 2021-02-01 1
105220 Homework ¹Ú*¸® ¿Ï·á 2021-02-01 329
105219 Monday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-02-01 252
105218 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-01 1
105217 Korea unveils plans to raise healthy life expectancy by 2030 À¯*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-02-01 3
105216 homework ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-01 291
105215 My new product ¹Ú*¸í ¿Ï·á 2021-02-01 301
105214 Do you think the invention and rise of computers has been a good... ¼­*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-01 304
105213 Ingredients in rose pasta ¼±*¸² ¿Ï·á 2021-02-01 355
105212 Which greeting kind of annoys you? À¯*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-01-31 275
105211 Homework ¹Ú*¹ü ¿Ï·á 2021-01-31 222
105210 homework ÀÌ*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2021-01-31 1
105209 homework ÀÌ*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2021-01-31 1
105208 homework ÀÌ*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2021-01-31 1
105207 Would you choose a different field if you were to start your... ±è*Áö ¿Ï·á 2021-01-31 291
105206 Travel ±è*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2021-01-31 912
105205 Lego ninjago ±è*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-01-31 342

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04