¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What are some ways we can help homeless people?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: È«*Àº
2021-02-03 365

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

First, we can search for a fund that helps homeless people and send some money to the fund. In the street, I sometimes see a desk and posters that promote lives of homeless people. We can spend some time there looking into it and sign for the fund if we are willing to support financially.
Second, we can volunteer for homeless people. In my church, there is an organization that provides free food and groceries to homeless people twice a week. I think joining that kind of voluntary work could be helpful.
I think the ways I wrote could be indirect which could be done through a fund or an organization. It's because we barely have chance to meet the homeless people in person. I think the most important thing is that we should have interests on it and behave when we have opportunities to help them.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Kylie! ^^
Thank you for giving your opinion on this topic. 
It's touching to know that your church helps the homeless. It is really inspiring~

- T. Rina


1. First, we can search for a fund that helps homeless people and send some money to the fund. 
>> CORRECT!

2. In the street, I sometimes see a desk and posters that promote lives of homeless people. 
>> On the street, I sometimes see a desk and some posters that promote the lives of homeless people.

3. We can spend some time there looking into it and sign for the fund if we are willing to support financially.
>> We can spend some time there looking into it and sign for the fund if we are willing to support them financially.

4. Second, we can volunteer for homeless people. 
>> CORRECT!

5. In my church, there is an organization that provides free food and groceries to homeless people twice a week. 
>> CORRECT!

6. I think joining that kind of voluntary work could be helpful.
>> CORRECT!

7. I think the ways I wrote could be indirect which could be done through a fund or an organization. 
>> CORRECT!

8. It's because we barely have chance to meet the homeless people in person. 
>> It's because we barely have a chance to meet homeless people in person.

9. I think the most important thing is that we should have interests on it and behave when we have opportunities to help them.
>> I think the most important thing is that we should have interests and act on it when we have opportunities to help them.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
105224 My work 5 ÇÏ*³ª ¿Ï·á 2021-02-01 323
105223 My work 3 ÇÏ*³ª ¿Ï·á 2021-02-01 315
105222 My work 2 ÇÏ*³ª ¿Ï·á 2021-02-01 305
105221 My work ÇÏ*³ª ¿Ï·á 2021-02-01 1
105220 Homework ¹Ú*¸® ¿Ï·á 2021-02-01 331
105219 Monday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-02-01 252
105218 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-01 1
105217 Korea unveils plans to raise healthy life expectancy by 2030 À¯*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-02-01 3
105216 homework ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-01 294
105215 My new product ¹Ú*¸í ¿Ï·á 2021-02-01 301
105214 Do you think the invention and rise of computers has been a good... ¼­*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-01 306
105213 Ingredients in rose pasta ¼±*¸² ¿Ï·á 2021-02-01 355
105212 Which greeting kind of annoys you? À¯*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-01-31 275
105211 Homework ¹Ú*¹ü ¿Ï·á 2021-01-31 223
105210 homework ÀÌ*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2021-01-31 1
105209 homework ÀÌ*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2021-01-31 1
105208 homework ÀÌ*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2021-01-31 1
105207 Would you choose a different field if you were to start your... ±è*Áö ¿Ï·á 2021-01-31 293
105206 Travel ±è*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2021-01-31 912
105205 Lego ninjago ±è*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-01-31 344

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04