¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

How can child abuse be prevented or avoided?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ¿À*°æ
2021-02-03 228

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

It is really difficut problem to prevent. Any laws and rules can't prevent a crime and avoid devil like people. Offenders are everywhere. I think we should develop social mood reporting crimes to police easily. Also police should find a offender. In korea, sometimes child abuse is regarded as family problems. So when we report police, they sometimes neglect this reporting.Recently one child was killed by adoptive parents. His kindergarten teacher reported police three times. But it was not accepted. His adoptive parents had a scocial power and their crime was hidden. As a result, one child could not help dying. This news was so terrible and shocked people.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Thank you Ms. Alice!
I hope you are doing great. :) Oh this news is really saddening. :(
~Lucy

It is really difficut problem to prevent.
>It is really difficult problem to prevent.
 Any laws and rules can't prevent a crime and avoid devil like people.
>>CORRECT!
 Offenders are everywhere.
>>CORRECT!
 I think we should develop social mood reporting crimes to police easily. 
>>CORRECT!
Also police should find a offender.
>>Also police should find an offender.
 In korea, sometimes child abuse is regarded as family problems.
>> In Korea, sometimes child abuse is regarded as family problems.
 So when we report police, they sometimes neglect this reporting. 
>>CORRECT!
Recently one child was killed by adoptive parents. 
>>CORRECT!
His kindergarten teacher reported police three times. 
>>CORRECT!
But it was not accepted. 
>>CORRECT!
His adoptive parents had a scocial power and their crime was hidden.
>>CORRECT!
 As a result, one child could not help dying. 
>>CORRECT!
This news was so terrible and shocked people.
>>CORRECT!

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
105834 Homework (226) ¹Ú*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-19 1088
105833 [2/16]/Homework ¹Ú*¹ü ¿Ï·á 2021-02-19 0
105832 The thing I like the most in my hometown ±è*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-02-19 1000
105831 How do you want to be comforted when you are not in your best... Ȳ*Á¶ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-19 966
105830 What¡¯s the most interesting thing you can do in your house if... ±è*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-19 991
105829 grammar ¼Õ*¸² ¿Ï·á 2021-02-19 1089
105828 HOMEWORK Á¤*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-19 0
105827 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-19 0
105826 The best gift to our parents is letter. ±è*¶û ¿Ï·á 2021-02-19 1101
105825 How many languages can you speak? How will you use English in... ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-02-19 1083
105824 Why do you think that there are a lot of people who like to go... °û*È¿ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-19 1071
105823 HOMEWORK ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-19 1074
105822 Friday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-02-19 1191
105821 What kind of exercise would you like to try doing? ¼Û*·É ¿Ï·á 2021-02-19 1135
105820 Friday ±è*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-19 997
105819 What is something that is not yet existing but you want to be... ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-19 1
105818 The most important thing in a relationship À¯*¸° ¿Ï·á 2021-02-19 1
105817 Privacy Á¶*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-19 1
105816 Homework: Àü*¿Á ¿Ï·á 2021-02-19 0
105815 Where would I recommend others to see in Korea ½É*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-19 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04