¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

How can child abuse be prevented or avoided?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ¿À*°æ
2021-02-03 199

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

It is really difficut problem to prevent. Any laws and rules can't prevent a crime and avoid devil like people. Offenders are everywhere. I think we should develop social mood reporting crimes to police easily. Also police should find a offender. In korea, sometimes child abuse is regarded as family problems. So when we report police, they sometimes neglect this reporting.Recently one child was killed by adoptive parents. His kindergarten teacher reported police three times. But it was not accepted. His adoptive parents had a scocial power and their crime was hidden. As a result, one child could not help dying. This news was so terrible and shocked people.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Thank you Ms. Alice!
I hope you are doing great. :) Oh this news is really saddening. :(
~Lucy

It is really difficut problem to prevent.
>It is really difficult problem to prevent.
 Any laws and rules can't prevent a crime and avoid devil like people.
>>CORRECT!
 Offenders are everywhere.
>>CORRECT!
 I think we should develop social mood reporting crimes to police easily. 
>>CORRECT!
Also police should find a offender.
>>Also police should find an offender.
 In korea, sometimes child abuse is regarded as family problems.
>> In Korea, sometimes child abuse is regarded as family problems.
 So when we report police, they sometimes neglect this reporting. 
>>CORRECT!
Recently one child was killed by adoptive parents. 
>>CORRECT!
His kindergarten teacher reported police three times. 
>>CORRECT!
But it was not accepted. 
>>CORRECT!
His adoptive parents had a scocial power and their crime was hidden.
>>CORRECT!
 As a result, one child could not help dying. 
>>CORRECT!
This news was so terrible and shocked people.
>>CORRECT!

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
105301 Homework ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-02-02 239
105300 How to study a foreign language ÀÌ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-02 359
105299 If i could be a star or a celebrity for just one day. ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-02-02 240
105298 What do I usually do when I go tothe beach ½É*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-02 1
105297 grammar ¼Õ*¸² ¿Ï·á 2021-02-02 212
105296 What three adjectives best describe January, and why? ±è*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-02 339
105295 I don\'t think mermaids are real ±è*¶û ¿Ï·á 2021-02-02 302
105294 Hacking ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-02 4
105293 I wonder grammer À±*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-02 1
105292 Homework °­*¸² ¿Ï·á 2021-02-02 330
105291 30-day homework ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-02 221
105290 Letter to school draft - correction (3) ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-02 0
105289 Letter to school draft - correction (2) ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-02 1
105288 Letter to school draft - correction (1) ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-02 2
105287 Which hobbise are the most popular in your country? ¼Û*·É ¿Ï·á 2021-02-02 247
105286 I usually use a map application on my phone. ±è*Å ¿Ï·á 2021-02-02 1
105285 What can happen if a person has nd friends? ¼Û*·É ¿Ï·á 2021-02-02 280
105284 Homework ÀÌ*¾Ö ¿Ï·á 2021-02-02 3
105283 HOMEWORK ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-02 282
105282 Homework ½É*»ó ¿Ï·á 2021-02-02 289

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04