¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

The worst holidays

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*ȯ
2021-02-22 1177

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Usually, We do not work end of year from Christmas to first day of new year. I go to see a beach or climb a mountain in that period. I organize the year, and I get ready for the new year in that period. We also didn't work end of last year. But, I couldn't go anywhere. I stayed all that time at home. My family had dinner together but mood was so different. When I was younger than now, I hadn't recognized that visiting somewhere is very important for me especially end of years. I am going to middle age of my life. I think that every moments are more important than before. I want to do what I love to do as often as I can. Please somebody get rid of COVID-19 now.
After COVID-19, every holidays are worst.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello Il Hwan,

  Thank you for taking time to answer this question. It only proves that you really wanted to improve in your English skill. Please do check and take note of the corrections for your improvement. I hope it helped you. 

Keep up the good work!

Sincerely,
Teacher Annie (^^)



Usually, We do not work end of year from Christmas to first day of new year.
>>> Usually, We do not work at the end of the year from Christmas to the first day of the New Year.

I go to see a beach or climb a mountain in that period. 
>>> CORRECT 

I organize the year, and I get ready for the new year in that period. 
>>> I organize the ending year, and I get ready for the new year in that period. 

We also didn't work end of last year. But, I couldn't go anywhere. 
>>> We also didn't work at the end of last year but, I couldn't go anywhere. 

I stayed all that time at home. 
>>> CORRECT 

My family had dinner together but mood was so different. 
>>> My family had dinner together but the mood was so different.

When I was younger than now, I hadn't recognized that visiting somewhere is very important for me especially end of years. 
>>> When I was younger, I hadn't recognized that visiting somewhere is very important for me especially at the end of the year. 

I am going to middle age of my life. I think that every moments are more important than before. 
>>> I am getting old not getting younger so I think that every moment is more important than before. 

I want to do what I love to do as often as I can. 
>>> CORRECT

Please somebody get rid of COVID-19 now.
>>> Please can somebody get rid of COVID-19 now.

After COVID-19, every holidays are worst.
>>> During COVID-19, every holiday is the worst.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
105501 loosen up a bit ½É*¼º ¿Ï·á 2021-02-08 9
105500 I\'m punctual person, and being punctual is important. ±è*¶û ¿Ï·á 2021-02-08 404
105499 homework_21.02.04 ÀÌ*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-02-08 1
105498 How can child abuse be prevented or avoided? ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-08 3
105497 Do you want to have a twin? Why or why not? ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-08 3
105496 I\\\'m not doing anything preparing a disaster À¯*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-02-08 458
105495 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-08 0
105494 What comes to mind when you think of pet. ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-02-08 386
105493 Musical Â÷*ºó ¿Ï·á 2021-02-08 452
105492 If you moved to another country, what things would you miss... ³ë*ÀÌ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-08 1
105491 Homework {02/03} Â÷*ºó ¿Ï·á 2021-02-08 479
105490 Elements Â÷*ºó ¿Ï·á 2021-02-08 410
105489 homework (Yoonha) Á¤*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-08 1
105488 Homework0208 ±è*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-02-08 485
105487 HOMEWORK FOR 02.08 Á¤*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-08 635
105486 Do you agree that \"age is just a number\"? In your country, how... À¯*¸° ¿Ï·á 2021-02-08 1
105485 Twins ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-08 3
105484 How can we get rid of bad habits? ÀÌ*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-08 449
105483 Homework ÀÌ*¾Ö ¿Ï·á 2021-02-08 3
105482 Fortnight ±è*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-08 535

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04