¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Many people think that every individual is responsible for their happiness, but some people believe

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Ȳ*ÇÏ
2021-02-22 1070

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I think happiness depends on personal mind. I can be happy how I think regardless of wealth, health and factors around me. However, if I can't keep my basic life from food to hosing, I can't have positive mind for my life. I would feel frustrated, exhausted and see the world like disaster. Education for children and basic right should be guaranteed by the government. People also need jobs to get money. The monk who is really famous in Korea said that people have to try not to have many things. He suggested us to empty our mind by training like meditation. He also stressed that happiness start from not to have any possessions. I partially agree with it but I think we can control ourselves if we can solve basic needs. We have heard a lot of stories about rich people that they are not always happy because humans desire are infinite. Rich people don't think that they are rich so they want to earn more money. Rich people have a lot of conflicts with their family members because of money.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good morning MR. HWANG~! ^^ Thanks for doing your homework! ^^Tuesday is a good day to reflect on the types of thoughts you are feeding your mind each day! Have a good one~! See you! 
>>> TEACHER GEMMA
I think happiness depends on personal mind.
>>> CORRECT
>>> OR I think happiness depends on one's mind.
 I can be happy how I think regardless of wealth, health and factors around me. 
>>> I can be happy regardless of wealth, health and some factors around me. 
However, if I can't keep my basic life from food to hosing, I can't have positive mind for my life. 
>>> CORRECT
I would feel frustrated, exhausted and see the world like a disaster.
>>> CORRECT
 Education for children and basic right should be guaranteed by the government.
>>> CORRECT
 People also need jobs to get money.
>>> CORRECT
 The monk who is really famous in Korea said that people have to try not to have many things.
>>> A monk who is really famous in Korea said that people have to try not to have many things.
 He suggested us to empty our mind by training like meditation.
>>>  He suggested us to empty our mind by meditation.
 He also stressed that happiness start from not to have any possessions.
>>>  He also stressed that happiness starts from not having any possessions.
 I partially agree with it but I think we can control ourselves if we can solve basic needs.
>>>  I partially agree with it but I think we can control ourselves if we can solve our basic needs.
 We have heard a lot of stories about rich people that they are not always happy because humans' desires are infinite. 
>>> CORRECT
Rich people don't think that they are rich so they want to earn more money.
>>> CORRECT
 Rich people have a lot of conflicts with their family members because of money.
>>> CORRECT
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
105704 The things I expect for this new year ±è*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-02-16 805
105703 What do you get from watching movies/dramas? ±è*¿¹ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-16 0
105702 Do you agree that video games should be prohibited to teenagers? ±è*¿¹ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-16 0
105701 Homework (224) ¹Ú*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-16 825
105700 Noun FRUIT and adjective FRUTY ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-02-16 767
105699 What makes someone beautiful? Á¶*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-02-16 1
105698 About self-esteem ¼±*¸² ¿Ï·á 2021-02-16 797
105697 Better learning ÀÌ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-16 954
105696 Homework ±è*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2021-02-16 788
105695 grammar ¼Õ*¸² ¿Ï·á 2021-02-16 799
105694 There is a lot of importance of rocks. ±è*¶û ¿Ï·á 2021-02-16 962
105693 In my country ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-16 2
105692 Do you believe in miracles? What miracles happen around you... ¼­*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-16 833
105691 What do you think is the reason why the students weren\'t... ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-16 1
105690 Would you like to be famous? Why or why not? ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-16 1
105689 HOMEWORK ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-16 801
105688 If you had one wish at this point in time, what would it be?... È«*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-02-16 1
105687 What are the things you expect for this new year? ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-02-16 0
105686 heard to getting older Á¶*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-02-16 1
105685 Homework ÀÌ*¾Ö ¿Ï·á 2021-02-16 6

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04