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영작교정 게시판

영어 말하기와 쓰기를 동시에 잡는다!

자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
회원님들께 무료로 제공해드리는 부가 서비스로, 전문 분야를 제외한 자유 주제
또는 강사님이 내주시는 과제를 회원님께서 영어로 작성해주시면,
담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

HOMEWORK FOR 03.08

작성자: 정*영
2021-03-08 4668

회원님의 영작문

Question : Why did you apply to our company?

Answer :
I started learning the golf after I quit my company.
And I'm interested in playing the golf and also golf company too.
I could see the bright future of golf industry.
Because golf is getting popular among the young people like 20s and 30s.
And also there are a lot of golf channel on youtube and getting popular too.
Your company has the best golf brand in the world.
I want to work with the best golf company so that's why I applyed to your company.


Job interview was really hard for me.
But I could learn a lot because of your kind and nice teaching.
Thank you :D
As like a Monday, I will answer the question first, and then I would like to you make a direction to me.
If I could apply the class and have 20 minutes class more, I think the time will be remained after talk Wednesday's class topic.
If that happens, can you give a another question to me like real job interview?
Have a good night and see you tomorrow.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hello, Jun! I admire your diligence to prepare for our class. Awesome! For your answer, I would like to suggest that you also make a research about why that golf company is famous and what do you expect  from them. How do you think the company can help you and how can you help them? One two sentences to answer these questions will do. I think your answer will become better if you add these. Thank you! See you! -Faith-
Question : Why did you apply to our company?
>> CORRECT
Answer : 
>> CORRECT
I started learning the golf after I quit my company.
>> I started learning golf after I quit my company.
And I'm interested in playing the golf and also golf company too.
>> Now,  I'm interested in playing golf and golf companies, too.
I could see the bright future of golf industry.
>> I could see the bright future of golf industries.
Because golf is getting popular among the young people like 20s and 30s.
>> Because, golf is getting popular among the young people who are in their 20s and 30s.
And also there are a lot of golf channel on youtube and getting popular too.
>> Also, there is a lot of golf channels on YouTube which are becoming famous nowadays.
Your company has the best golf brand in the world.
>> Above all,  your company is the best golf brand in the world.
I want to work with the best golf company so that's why I applyed to your company.
>> I want to work with the best golf company that's why I applied here.
Job interview was really hard for me.
>> The job interview practice was really hard for me.
But I could learn a lot because of your kind and nice teaching.
>> But, I could learn a lot because of your kind and nice teaching.
Thank you :D
>> CORRECT
As like a Monday, I will answer the question first, and then I would like to you make a direction to me.
>> Just like last Monday, I will answer the question first, and then I would like you to give me suggestions to improve it.
If I could apply the class and have 20 minutes class more, I think the time will be remained after talk Wednesday's class topic.
>> If I could apply for another 20-minute class, I think there will be remaining time after our Wednesday's class topic.
If that happens, can you give a another question to me like real job interview?
>> If that happens, can you give me another question to make it like a real job interview?
Have a good night and see you tomorrow.
>> CORRECT

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[마이페이지 > 수업 내용 보기 > 학습 캘린더 > 영작교정 버튼 클릭]

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지난 날짜에도 게시 할 수 있습니다.

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첨삭이 가능하며,

올려주신 글의 강사님 첨삭은 24시간 이내에
완료 되는 것을 원칙으로 하고 있습니다.
03
하루 게시 가능한 글은 3회까지 이며,
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04

와이즈에듀케이션아이(주) 사이트명: 파워잉글리쉬 대표이사 전상현
사업자등록번호: 217-81-44736 통신판매신고번호: 2014-서울도봉-0233호
서울본사: 서울시 노원구 한글비석로 245 두타빌 B동 7층 713호
대표번호 1688-8672 개인정보관리 책임자: 안희영 [powerenglish@pweng.net]