¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Describe an enjoyable dinner that you had with friends

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ¹®*Çö
2021-03-11 4436

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

The most memorable dinner was what I had with friends before leaving Japan. I went to Japanese university, and I had to rush back to Korea after graduation due to pandemic and border closure between Japan. Thankfully, some of my friends organized farewell dinner at Italian restaurant. We had anchovy pasta and margarita pizza. We had a deep conversation about life after graduation. The main topic was about job-hunting and the application process for graduate school. I enjoyed the dinner because we were able to catch-up in the most difficult time and cheer each other up to get through the hardship.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Here's your edited composition, Aciel. 

Cheers,
Jean~~
 

The most memorable dinner was what I had with friends before leaving Japan. 
>> The most unforgettable meal was what I had with my friends before leaving Japan. 

I went to Japanese university, and I had to rush back to Korea after graduation due to pandemic and border closure between Japan. 
>> I went to Japan for my higher education, and I had to rush back to Korea after graduation due to the pandemic and border closure between Japan and other countries. 

Thankfully, some of my friends organized farewell dinner at Italian restaurant. 
>> Thankfully, some of my friends organized a farewell dinner at an Italian restaurant. 

We had anchovy pasta and margarita pizza. 
>> We had an anchovy pasta and a margarita pizza. 

We had a deep conversation about life after graduation.
>> We had a profound conversation about life after graduation.

 The main topic was about job-hunting and the application process for graduate school. I enjoyed the dinner because we were able to catch-up in the most difficult time and cheer each other up to get through the hardship.
>> correct

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
105851 Homework ÀÌ*¾Ö ¿Ï·á 2021-02-21 9
105850 The surgery ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-21 2
105849 ¿µÀÛ ¼÷Á¦ ÀÌ*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-02-21 4
105848 Do you have any vice? Á¤*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-02-21 1024
105847 Homework ÀÌ*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-21 1
105846 Homework ÀÌ*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-21 1
105845 My first day of holiday in Korea Da*d OH ¿Ï·á 2021-02-21 1
105844 My first day of holiday in Korea Da*d OH ¿Ï·á 2021-02-21 3
105843 My first day of holiday in Korea Da*d OH ¿Ï·á 2021-02-21 3
105842 If I could live someone else\'s life Á¶*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-20 2
105841 Homework ½É*¼º ¿Ï·á 2021-02-20 7
105840 Why celebrity beauty brands are good business À¯*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-02-20 1
105839 Pro bono lawyers sue on behalf of animals in peril À¯*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-02-20 1
105838 Describe the best party that you have been to. Why was it the... Á¤*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-20 1144
105837 HOMEWORK FOR 02.19 Á¤*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-19 1136
105836 What do you like about the Korean Educational system? ±è*¿¹ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-19 0
105835 To Gina ÇÑ*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-19 1510
105834 Homework (226) ¹Ú*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-19 1098
105833 [2/16]/Homework ¹Ú*¹ü ¿Ï·á 2021-02-19 0
105832 The thing I like the most in my hometown ±è*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-02-19 1007

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04