¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

If you can change something in your house, what would it be and why?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*Á¤
2021-03-11 5353

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

if I can change something in my house, I want to remove a lot of things in the rest of room and make home gym. Actually, there's gym in the basement of the apartment but there's only one rack which can work out various things. I can't work at all if someone is using rack. so I want to make own rack in my house. I think that's what people who loves working out want to do.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Tobby!

Thank you for making an effort in answering your homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon!

if I can change something in my house, I want to remove a lot of things in the rest of room and make home gym. 
>> If I can change something in my house, I want to remove a lot of things and make the space into a home gym. 

Actually, there's gym in the basement of the apartment but there's only one rack which can work out various things. 
>>Actually, there's gym in the basement of the apartment but there's only one rack where can work out on various things. 

I can't work at all if someone is using rack. so I want to make own rack in my house. 
>> I can't work out is someone is using it so I want to have my own at my house. 

I think that's what people who loves working out want to do.
>> I think that's what people who loves working out wants to do. 
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
108086 Homework (274) ¹Ú*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-30 1113
108085 homework ¹Ú*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-04-30 3
108084 What do you have in common with your sibling? Ȳ*Á¶ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-30 1289
108083 YEs Á¤*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-30 2
108082 no Á¤*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-30 1
108081 YEs Á¤*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-30 1
108080 I Á¤*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-30 0
108079 Do you think that the issue put your president in a difficult... ±Ç*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-04-30 845
108078 Do you believe in superstitions? If yes, give me an example of... ÀÌ*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-30 1084
108077 Do you believe in superstitions? If yes, give me an example of... ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-04-30 0
108076 grammar ¼Õ*¸² ¿Ï·á 2021-04-30 1004
108075 Homework º¯*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-30 685
108074 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-30 0
108073 A long-lost Friend ÁÖ*³ª ¿Ï·á 2021-04-30 3
108072 For my health ÀÌ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-30 795
108071 Have you ever made somebody cry? Why did he or she cry? ³ë*ÀÌ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-30 1
108070 If you wanted to reward yourself for something that you did,... ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-30 739
108069 Friday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-04-30 878
108068 Prevention is better than cure. What does this phrase mean, and... ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-04-30 1011
108067 Would you invest in real estate if you had the chance? ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-04-30 834

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04