¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

If you can change something in your house, what would it be and why?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*Á¤
2021-03-11 5290

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

if I can change something in my house, I want to remove a lot of things in the rest of room and make home gym. Actually, there's gym in the basement of the apartment but there's only one rack which can work out various things. I can't work at all if someone is using rack. so I want to make own rack in my house. I think that's what people who loves working out want to do.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Tobby!

Thank you for making an effort in answering your homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon!

if I can change something in my house, I want to remove a lot of things in the rest of room and make home gym. 
>> If I can change something in my house, I want to remove a lot of things and make the space into a home gym. 

Actually, there's gym in the basement of the apartment but there's only one rack which can work out various things. 
>>Actually, there's gym in the basement of the apartment but there's only one rack where can work out on various things. 

I can't work at all if someone is using rack. so I want to make own rack in my house. 
>> I can't work out is someone is using it so I want to have my own at my house. 

I think that's what people who loves working out want to do.
>> I think that's what people who loves working out wants to do. 
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
107096 Skip ¼Û*ö ¿Ï·á 2021-03-31 1743
107095 Royal Family Â÷*ºó ¿Ï·á 2021-03-31 1007
107094 HOMEWORK ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-31 859
107093 Wednesday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-03-31 1064
107092 Coffee Á¶*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-31 1272
107091 SMILE ANSWER º¯*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-31 1482
107090 What was one of the happiest times in your entire life? ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-31 0
107089 Homework Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-31 1489
107088 What are the most common organizations in your country and what... ³ë*ÀÌ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-31 1
107087 What are the things that you have learned last year? ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-03-31 1
107086 If you could be born in another country, which one would you... ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-03-31 0
107085 What are the things that you have learned last year? ÀÌ*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-31 805
107084 I... ¹®*°æ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-31 1
107083 Composition º¯*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-31 1588
107082 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-31 1
107081 Do you think the world would be a better place without cars? ±è*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-31 1517
107080 Is it better to talk about and share opinions or keep them to... ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-03-31 1544
107079 What is your favorite season and why? ÇÏ*Á¶ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-31 1702
107078 Homework ¾ç*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-03-31 0
107077 HI.... Á¶*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-03-31 0

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04