¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

The thing I want to change if I can change something in my house

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¿ø
2021-03-11 4167

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I¡¯m using a room with my sister so sometimes I want my own room. There¡¯s no problem with my sister but I want my room for a long time. Few years ago I ask my mom to make my room but at that time I¡¯m afraid of sleeping alone. So if I have a chance I want to make my own room and decorate it.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Heidi! That sounds like a good idea. Imagine all the possibilities that you could do with that much space. You can do a lot of things with that :)

Thank you for making an effort in answering your homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon!

I¡¯m using a room with my sister so sometimes I want my own room. 
>> CORRECT

There¡¯s no problem with my sister but I want my room for a long time.
>> There's no problem with being with my sister but I have always wanted to have my own room. 

Few years ago I ask my mom to make my room but at that time I¡¯m afraid of sleeping alone. 
>> Few years ago, I asked my mom if I can have my own room but I was afraid to be along during that time. 

So if I have a chance I want to make my own room and decorate it.
>> So if I will have the chance, I want to have my own room and decorate it. 
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
106459 If you were born again,would you like to br a dog or cat. ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-03-11 4044
106458 If you are going to save up some money for something, what would... Çã*´Ã ¿Ï·á 2021-03-11 5
106457 Yes, I afraid of the great white shark. ±è*¶û ¿Ï·á 2021-03-11 5245
106456 question ÀÌ*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-11 4009
106455 What are the three most important things for you to be happy? Çã*´Ã ¿Ï·á 2021-03-11 5
106454 What do you want to do in your life? ³ë*ÀÌ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-11 1
106453 HOMEWORK ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-11 4510
106452 Homework ½É*»ó ¿Ï·á 2021-03-11 4072
106451 Thursday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-03-11 4845
106450 Beauty ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-11 3
106449 hihi~ Àå*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-03-11 2
106448 homework Ç¥*È£ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-11 25
106447 One of the most important issues facing the world today is a... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-11 3591
106446 Do we need to be honest all the time? Why or why not? ¹Ú*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-11 4079
106445 question ÀÌ*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-11 3844
106444 Who is the most controversial politician in your country? Why... ±è*¿­ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-11 4270
106443 Describe an enjoyable dinner that you had with friends ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-03-11 4364
106442 How can traveling be educational? ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-03-11 4973
106441 Where is best for you to stay over? ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-11 6312
106440 2 nurses test positive for COVID-19 after Pfizer vaccine shots À¯*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-03-11 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04