¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

The ratio of poverty is increasing worldwide. What are the reasons for world poverty? What can be do

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Ȳ*ÇÏ
2021-03-15 4223

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I think it is deeply related with the capitalism and elitism that cause serious polarization. Most countries consider that democracy is the best system for human because people can be equal regardless race and have a chance to get education. However, this system has created a lot of social problem. We all know if we graduate the well-known university, our life will be successful. But we have to realize the difference of starting point. Children who are born with silver spoon would get the best education based on their wealth. On the other hands, children who are not rich might have problem to eat, so many people give up to study because they have to work for their family. The equality of chance seems like attractive but contain a lot of disadvantages. It sometime make people disappointed because if they fail to do something, it looks like it's because of their fault even though it's because of the structure problem. So, our society have to think about better system for us to solve it

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi there Mr. Hwang~! ^^  
The people who achieve incredible success in the world aren¡¯t always the most naturally brilliant but rather, are the hardest workers.
Encourage yourself to roll up your sleeves and put in the effort with empowering hard work.
¡°There are no shortcuts to any place worth going.¡±
Keep yourself on track. ~! ^^
>>> TEACHER GEMMA
I think it is deeply related with the capitalism and elitism that cause serious polarization. 
>>> I think it is deeply related to the capitalism and elitism that cause serious polarization. 
Most countries consider that democracy is the best system for human because people can be equal regardless race and have a chance to get education. 
>>> Most countries consider that democracy is the best system for human because people can be equal regardless of race and  a chance to get education. 
However, this system has created a lot of social problem. 
>>> However, this system has created a lot of social problems. 
We all know if we graduate the well-known university, our life will be successful. 
>>> We all know that if we graduate from a well-known university, our life will be successful. 
But we have to realize the difference of the starting point. 
>>> CORRECT
Children who are born with silver spoon would get the best education based on their wealth. 
>>> CORRECT
On the other hands, children who are not rich might have problem to eat, so many people give up to study because they have to work for their family.
>>> CORRECT
 The equality of chance seems like attractive but contains a lot of disadvantages.
>>> CORRECT
 It sometime make people disappointed because if they fail to do something, it looks like it's because of their fault even though it's because of the structure problem.
>>> CORRECT
 So, our society have to think about a better system for us to solve.
>>> CORRECT
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
106215 What are you thoughts about having face to face classes even if... ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-03-04 0
106214 What are the advantages and disadvantages of using social media... ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-03-04 0
106213 Why do we need to help other people? ¼Û*·É ¿Ï·á 2021-03-04 4677
106212 Hi º¯*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-04 4362
106211 Could you check my writing? Á¤*ö ¿Ï·á 2021-03-04 4104
106210 homework ÀÌ*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-04 4928
106209 What is the most important characteristic to have when working... ÀÌ*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-04 4264
106208 What makes a city great to live in? Are cities good for the... È«*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2021-03-04 1
106207 What are the advantages and disadvantages of using social media... ¹Ú*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-04 4606
106206 What are you thoughts about having face to face classes even if... Çã*´Ã ¿Ï·á 2021-03-04 4
106205 What are the comedy movies you have seen? ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-04 5248
106204 The graph below shows tourism statistics among Venezuelian... Á¤*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-03-04 3640
106203 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-04 2
106202 If you went to school again, what would you do differently? ±è*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-04 4670
106201 Face to face class ¼³*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-04 4001
106200 check please ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-03-04 4467
106199 HOMEWORK FOR 03.03 Á¤*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-03 4127
106198 Homework ÀÌ*¾Ö ¿Ï·á 2021-03-03 5
106197 What do you like about cats? ±è*¿¹ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-03 0
106196 Homework (233) ¹Ú*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-03 3624

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04