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영작교정 게시판

영어 말하기와 쓰기를 동시에 잡는다!

자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
회원님들께 무료로 제공해드리는 부가 서비스로, 전문 분야를 제외한 자유 주제
또는 강사님이 내주시는 과제를 회원님께서 영어로 작성해주시면,
담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

Some people say that all popular TV entertainment programs should aim to educate viewers about impor

작성자: 황*하
2021-03-19 3407

회원님의 영작문

I don't agree with it because viewers have a right to select what we want to watch. The broadcasting company must offer various TV programs for views. Some people expressed the concern about the power of TV that might cause adverse effect to viewers. Especially, teenagers tend to imitate what celebrities do on TV. So, I think TV show has to be marked the proper ages that can watch it or ask viewers to confirm their certification that they are adults. My son always ask me to not to watch news because we can see a lot of criminal events from the news. He express that he would feel frustrated if he watch violent scenes and crimes. Even though, broadcasting company filter their programs on various ways, people can watch anything on YouTube. It has created many problem these day. We have to discuss about the best way to control all kind of media. I believe that most media help us in various field. Video materials are the most effective ones when we learn something. Proper regulation needs

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Good afternoon Mr. Hwang ~ ^^ Thanks for doing your homework! ^^ Have a nice day! ^^
>>> TEACHER GEMMA 
I don't agree with it because viewers have a right to select what we want to watch. 
>>> I don't agree with it because viewers have the right to select what they want to watch. 
The broadcasting company must offer various TV programs for views.
>>> The broadcasting company must offer various TV programs for viewing.
 Some people expressed the concern about the power of TV that might cause adverse effect to viewers. 
>>>  Some people expressed their concerns about the power of TV that might cause adverse effect to viewers. 
Especially, teenagers tend to imitate what celebrities do on TV.
>>> CORRECT
 So, I think TV show has to be marked the proper ages that can watch it or ask viewers to confirm their certification that they are adults. 
>>>  So, I think TV shows have to be indicate the proper ages that can watch it or ask viewers to confirm their certification that they are adults. 
My son always ask me to not to watch news because we can see a lot of criminal events from the news. 
>>> My son always asks me not to watch news because we can see a lot of criminal events from the news. 
He expresses that he would feel frustrated if he watch violent scenes and crimes. 
>>> CORRECT
Even though, broadcasting company filter their programs on various ways, people can watch anything on YouTube.
>>> CORRECT
 It has created many problem these day. 
>>>  It has created many problems these days. 
We have to discuss about the best way to control all kind of media.
>>> We have to discuss about the best ways to control all kinds of media.
 I believe that most media help us in various field.
>>> CORRECT
 Video materials are the most effective ones when we learn something.
>>> CORRECT
 Proper regulation needs...
>>> CORRECT
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02
전문 분야를 제외한 회원님이 직접 작성한 글만
첨삭이 가능하며,

올려주신 글의 강사님 첨삭은 24시간 이내에
완료 되는 것을 원칙으로 하고 있습니다.
03
하루 게시 가능한 글은 3회까지 이며,
종료된 수업의 영작교정 게시판은
이용이 어려운 점 양해 부탁 드립니다.
04

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