¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Can you tell a brief history of your hometown?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Á¤*¿ø
2021-03-21 3555

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

My hometown which is Damyang is famous for beautiful scenes of bamboo trees, peaceful farms, and malleable people. Thus many literary men were born in Damyang. Most poets used to discuss about political issues and share their opinion about their works.
There was a kind of school called SoSHeWon where was built in 1530 year in Joseon Dynasty. The walls are decorated with gorgeous hand writings by the greatest literary men who lived in that time. One of them, JungCheul who was an ancestor of my family cultivated many clever juniors at Soshewon from 1551 to 1561. It is still exist for visitors who want to feel the ancestor's emotions.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Happy Sunday to you Young Won!

It seems that you had an extensive research about your hometown to find out these details to place here on your composition. In many countries, one's roots is very important as it is where you trace your origin, culture, and tradition.

Now, you can tell these to your children for them to pass to their children too someday.

These details are more than enough for an IELTS answer. Thank you for always doing your best Yong Won.

See you tomorrow in class. Have a great night!

-T. Donna =)

My hometown which is Damyang is famous for beautiful scenes of bamboo trees, peaceful farms, and malleable people. 
>> Correct!

Thus many literary men were born in Damyang. 
>> Correct!

Most poets used to discuss about political issues and share their opinion about their works.
>> Correct!

There was a kind of school called SoSHeWon where was built in 1530 year in Joseon Dynasty. 
>> There is a kind of school called SoSHeWon that was built in the year 1530 in Joseon Dynasty. 

The walls are decorated with gorgeous hand writings by the greatest literary men who lived in that time. 
>> Correct!

One of them, JungCheul who was an ancestor of my family cultivated many clever juniors at Soshewon from 1551 to 1561. 
>> Correct!

It is still exist for visitors who want to feel the ancestor's emotions.
>> Correct!
Or: exists
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
107702 Some people think that famous people can help international aid... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-20 709
107701 What do you usually do when you are facing a really big problem? Çã*´Ã ¿Ï·á 2021-04-20 1
107700 Have got Àü*¼± ¿Ï·á 2021-04-20 716
107699 Where\'s the trendiest area in your city? Do you enjoy going... ³ë*ÀÌ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-20 1
107698 What do you usually do when you are facing a really big problem? ±è*¿­ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-20 621
107697 The early bird catches the early worm ÃÖ*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-20 905
107696 when do you think time flies so fast? ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-20 680
107695 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-20 1
107694 Who is the greatest actor of all time? º¯*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-20 671
107693 homework ³ë*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-20 2
107692 Sentence making: ±è*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-20 601
107691 Thank you ¾È*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-04-20 0
107690 Writing @ ¾È*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-04-19 1
107689 [04/16]Homework ¹Ú*¹ü ¿Ï·á 2021-04-19 1
107688 The most thing I love in our country ±è*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-04-19 759
107687 Homework (265) ¹Ú*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-19 668
107686 HOMEWORK ¿À*º½ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-19 3
107685 I... Á¤*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-19 1
107684 homework ¹Ú*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-04-19 4
107683 I... Á¤*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-19 0

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04