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Giving an expensive gadget to a kid.

작성자: 김*환
2021-03-21 3743

회원님의 영작문

My opinion is that giving an expensive gadget to a kid is not good idea. The kid doesn't know how much the gadget is. If I give the gadget to a kid, I always pay attention that how does he care of the gadget. If the kid loses or breaks the gadget, I can't forgive him.
In my case, When I give a gadget to my children, I give a used gadget or a cheap gadget. I went to glasses store to buy my sun's glasses with my sun. I told to my sun, "You can select the cheapest glasses. I wouldn't blame you, although you lose or break the glasses."
But, He could select, He didn't want the cheapest glasses. After 20 minutes, he hadn't selected glasses, A Clerk who had been waiting my sun offered a discount. After getting the discount, my sun could select more expensive glasses than I allowed.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hello Il Hwan,

  Thank you for taking time to answer this question. It only proves that you really wanted to improve in your English skill. Please do check and take note of the corrections for your improvement. I hope it helped you. 

Keep up the good work!

Sincerely,
Teacher Annie (^^)



My opinion is that giving an expensive gadget to a kid is not good idea. 
>>> My opinion is that giving an expensive gadget to a kid is not a good idea. 

The kid doesn't know how much the gadget is. 
>>> CORRECT

If I give the gadget to a kid, I always pay attention that how does he care of the gadget. 
>>> If I give an expensive gadget to a kid, then I will always pay attention to how he cares about the gadget. 

If the kid loses or breaks the gadget, I can't forgive him.
>>> CORRECT

In my case, When I give a gadget to my children, I give a used gadget or a cheap gadget. 
>>> In my case, when I give a gadget to my children, I give a used gadget or a cheap gadget. 

I went to glasses store to buy my sun's glasses with my sun. 
>>> One time I and my son went to a glasses store to buy my son's glasses.

I told to my sun, "You can select the cheapest glasses. I wouldn't blame you, although you lose or break the glasses."
>>> I told my son, "you can select the cheapest glasses. I wouldn't blame you, although you lose or break it."

But, He could select, He didn't want the cheapest glasses. 
>>> But, he could not select, he didn't want the cheapest glasses. 

After 20 minutes, he hadn't selected glasses, A Clerk who had been waiting my sun offered a discount. 
>>> After 20 minutes, he hadn't selected a pair of glasses, then the clerk who had been waiting for my son offered a discount. 

After getting the discount, my sun could select more expensive glasses than I allowed.
>>> After getting the discount, my son could select more expensive glasses than I allowed him to.
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