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ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

My favorite sports is archery.

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¶û
2021-03-25 1982

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®





Actually it hasn't been long since I learned archery, but I fell in love with archery. Archery is a game that divides the game with a bow. When I pull the string and shoot at the target, I love the sound and feel of it so I fell in love with the charm of archery. Prudence, accuracy, and balance are very important in this sport, and most important of all is arm strength. You must develop the strength of your arms and be able to handle them freely.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello Maria!

Congratulations for a job well done on this composition! As you can see, you got all of the sentences grammatically correct. Keep writing.

I am so proud of you!

See you in class.

-T. Donna =)

Actually it hasn't been long since I learned archery, but I fell in love with archery. 
>> Correct!
Or: Actually it hasn't been long since I learned archery, but I fell in love with it. 

Archery is a game that divides the game with a bow. 
>> Correct!

When I pull the string and shoot at the target, I love the sound and feel of it so I fell in love with the charm of archery. 
>> Correct!

Prudence, accuracy, and balance are very important in this sport, and most important of all is arm strength. 
>> Correct!

You must develop the strength of your arms and be able to handle them freely.
>> Correct!
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