¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Should there be a limit on how many children there should be in a family?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¿­
2021-03-28 1687

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

If it is limited to our country, I think we don't have to limit the birth of children. In Korea, the birthrate is currently 0.8 and the problem of low birth rate is serious. So governments are thinking about policies to increase the birth rate, but they are not as effective So I don't think there's any limit to the birth rate.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Steve! I think so too. Now, your country is facing the opposite problem of over population. I hope that the statistics would be balance soon. :) 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon

If it is limited to our country, I think we don't have to limit the birth of children. 
>> I don't think we need to have limit in birth rate in our country.

In Korea, the birthrate is currently 0.8 and the problem of low birth rate is serious. 
>>In Korea, the birthrate is currently 0.8 and this is a serious problem. 

So governments are thinking about policies to increase the birth rate, but they are not as effective So I don't think there's any limit to the birth rate.
>>So, the government is thinking about policies to increase the birth rate but they are not as effective.  This is why I don't think that there should be a limit in birth rate. 
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
107620 COMPOSITION º¯*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-17 3
107619 What gift would you like to receive? And why. ½Å*°æ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-16 756
107618 homework ¹Ú*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-04-16 4
107617 Homework (264) ¹Ú*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-16 649
107616 Homework ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-04-16 527
107615 The top five most-watched sports in the world! ¿À*¸° ¿Ï·á 2021-04-16 561
107614 Why do hospitals or hotels hire nutritionists? Ȳ*Á¶ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-16 553
107613 The best memory I have in school ±è*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-04-16 641
107612 homework ±è*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2021-04-16 2
107611 grammar ¼Õ*¸² ¿Ï·á 2021-04-16 532
107610 Homework ÀÌ*¾Ö ¿Ï·á 2021-04-16 5
107609 Watching TV ÀÌ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-16 824
107608 The rudeness ÁÖ*³ª ¿Ï·á 2021-04-16 4
107607 What would you like to invent if you become an inventor? ±Ç*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-04-16 454
107606 Hiking is good at our mental health. ±è*¶û ¿Ï·á 2021-04-16 583
107605 How much does the weekend mean to you? Á¤*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-04-16 683
107604 If you can have a big birthday party, how do you want it to be... ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-16 626
107603 Friday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-04-16 761
107602 If you can have a big birthday party, how do you want it to be... ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-04-16 0
107601 Do you like playing computer games? ÃÖ*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2021-04-16 775

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04