¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What are the things that you have learned last year?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*Á¤
2021-03-31 838

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

last year, I learned about electric such as power plant engineering and basic knowledge for electric. and I got a certicate for electric engineering. also I studied TOEIC which is English writing and listening test for graduation requirement. but I think Studying English is more harder than electric engineering which is my major. but I should be good at english to get my dream. so I try to study english.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Tobby! That sounds amazing! At least you learned a lot last year despite all the hardships our world is facing. It's okay to face some struggles. Always remember, "No pain, No gain!"

Thank you for making an effort in answering your homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon!


last year, I learned about electric such as power plant engineering and basic knowledge for electric. 
>>>Last year, I learned about electricity such as power plant engineering and basic knowledge for electricity.  

and I got a certicate for electric engineering. 
>> I also got a certificate for Electrical Engineer. 

also I studied TOEIC which is English writing and listening test for graduation requirement. 
>> I also studied TOEIC which is English writing and listening because I have test for our graduation requirement. 

but I think Studying English is more harder than electric engineering which is my major. 
>> I think Studying English is more harder than studying electric engineering, which is my major. 

but I should be good at english to get my dream. so I try to study english.
>>But I should be good at English to get my dream so I try to study this really hard. 
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
106318 Work email draft - correction (1/2) ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-08 26
106317 Constellation ±è*¶û ¿Ï·á 2021-03-08 3720
106316 True of False. ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-03-08 4576
106315 My day. ¾È*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-08 7
106314 Teacher\'s Day Â÷*ºó ¿Ï·á 2021-03-08 3849
106313 Homework. À¯*¿¹ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-08 4814
106312 Teacher Â÷*ºó ¿Ï·á 2021-03-08 4496
106311 HOMEWORK ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-08 4013
106310 Monday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-03-08 4106
106309 In 100 years from now, how different do you think the natural... ¹Ú*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-08 4438
106308 New Lesson ÀÌ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2021-03-08 3678
106307 Write about a time when you had an annoying incident. ¿À*°æ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-08 4498
106306 My priorities in looking for a job °­*±¸ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-08 3930
106305 Seoul\'s population falls below 10 million for the first time in... À¯*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-03-08 1
106304 Homework ±Ý*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-03-08 2
106303 It is generally believed that some people are born with certain... Á¤*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-03-08 4304
106302 In 100 years from now, how different do you think the natural... Çã*´Ã ¿Ï·á 2021-03-08 3
106301 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-08 1
106300 L... ¹®*°æ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-08 5
106299 In 100 years from now, how different do you think the natural... ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-03-08 0

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04