¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Why do many people try to have a healthy lifestyle?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¿Â
2021-03-31 1892

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I think most people nowadays are taking importance on their health because of longevity.
And it is the fact that lifespan of human is being longer.
If I live longer than I expect, I would like to have a happy life.
It will be sad if I have poor health.

I think the happiness depends on health, dream and love.
And if someone has a good state of health, he or she may have physical strength or time to help someone.

I'm one of the people who tries to have a heathy lifestyle.
I feel that what I ate makes myself.
And I also become healthier after I started checking and controling the quality of the food.

I recommend that you select healthier food when you are hungry.
And prepare the meal yourself. It will be more tastier because you made it yourself.
Treat yourself as you are an another person. (People are likely to treat themselves inhospitably I think)
And do it continuously.

It will make change today ,tomorrow, a month and whole life!

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Juliet~ Grateful Monday to the both of us! 
Thanks for sharing:)
>>> TEACHER James
I think most people nowadays are taking importance on their health because of longevity.
>>> CORRECT
And it is the fact that lifespan of human is being longer.
>>> And it is the fact that lifespan of a human is being longer.
If I live longer than I expect, I would like to have a happy life.
>>> CORRECT
It will be sad if I have poor health.
>>> CORRECT
I think the happiness depends on health, dream and love.
>>> I think happiness depends on health, dream, and love.
And if someone has a good state of health, he or she may have physical strength or time to help someone.
>>> CORRECT
I'm one of the people who tries to have a heathy lifestyle.
>>>  I'm one of the people who tries to have a healthy lifestyle.
I feel that what I ate makes myself.
>>> I feel that what I ate makes me who am I.
And I also become healthier after I started checking and controling the quality of the food.
>>> And I also become healthier after I started checking and controlling the quality of the food.
I recommend that you select healthier food when you are hungry.
>>> CORRECT
And prepare the meal yourself. It will be more tastier because you made it yourself.
>>> And prepare the meal yourself. It will be tastier because you made it yourself.
Treat yourself as you are an another person. (People are likely to treat themselves inhospitably I think)
And do it continuously.
>>>  Treat yourself as you are another person. (People are likely to treat themselves inhospitably I think)
And do it continuously.
It will make change today ,tomorrow, a month and whole life!
>>> It will make a change today, tomorrow, a month, and whole life!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
106044 If you could meet any famous person, dead or alive, who would it... ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-02-26 0
106043 HOMEWORK ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-26 1553
106042 What is something that you would have a hard time giving up and... ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-02-26 0
106041 14-year-old dog. ¿À*°æ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-26 1659
106040 Homework 2.26 Àå*º° ¿Ï·á 2021-02-26 1316
106039 homework ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-26 1626
106038 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-26 1
106037 Friday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-02-26 1498
106036 My first airplane ride and how I felt. ½É*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-26 0
106035 homework ÀÌ*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-26 1221
106034 English Homework 32 ÃÖ*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-02-26 1413
106033 M... ¹®*°æ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-26 2
106032 Do you like to try new restaurants, or do you prefer to go to... ³ë*ÀÌ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-26 2
106031 HOMEWORK FOR 02.25 Á¤*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-26 1615
106030 The reason why it does matter to me when people ask my age Á¶*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-25 2
106029 Do you think aliens exist? Why? ±è*À» ¿Ï·á 2021-02-25 1440
106028 WRT ¾È*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-02-25 3
106027 To protect ourselves from being a victim of a crime. ±è*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-25 1329
106026 Homework ÀÌ*¾Ö ¿Ï·á 2021-02-25 4
106025 What do you think is the animal that they shouldn\'t use for... ±è*¿¹ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-25 0

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04