¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

The increase of private cars causes many problems.

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Á¤*¼º
2021-04-01 1495

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

The increase of private cars causes many problems. Firstly, cars create air pollution by discharge exhaust gas. So the earth is getting damaged by air pollution. Secondly, the more increase personal cars, the more cause traffic jam. As a result, we have more waste time on the road.
the government is trying for reducing these problems because of the above troubles. The government has some solutions. The first thing is the development of electric vehicles. It doesn't discharge exhaust gas. So I believe that air pollution is going to reduce if there are many electric cars on the road. The second thing is using public transportation. I am sure Traffic congestion will also reduce if people use public transportation.

In conclusion, we should discourage people to use cars for reducing these problems. Also, the government should encourage all people to buy electric vehicles and to use public transportation.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good evening Andy. I hope you can talk as good as you write in here. Most of the time, you have a good content. ^_^
T. Irene
The increase of private cars causes many problems. 
>>> Correct. 
Firstly, cars create air pollution by discharge exhaust gas. 
>>> Firstly, cars create air pollution by discharging exhaust gas. 
So the earth is getting damaged by air pollution. 
>>> Correct. 
Secondly, the more increase personal cars, the more cause traffic jam. 
>>>  Secondly, the increasing number of personal cars cause more traffic jams. 
As a result, we have more waste time on the road.
>>> As a result, we waste or spend more time on the road. 
the government is trying for reducing these problems because of the above troubles. 
>>> The government is trying to solve these problems caused by those mentioned above. 
The government has some solutions.
>>> the government presented some solutions. 
 The first thing is the development of electric vehicles. 
>>> The first solution is the development of electric cars. 
It doesn't discharge exhaust gas. 
>>> Correct. 
So I believe that air pollution is going to reduce if there are many electric cars on the road. 
>>> So I believe that air pollution is going to be reduced if there are many electric cars on the road. 
The second thing is using public transportation. 
>>> The second solution is the use of public transport. 
I am sure Traffic congestion will also reduce if people use public transportation.
>>> I am sure Traffic congestion will also be reduced if people use public transportation.
In conclusion, we should discourage people to use cars for reducing these problems. 
>>> In conclusion, we should discourage people from using cars.  
Also, the government should encourage all people to buy electric vehicles and to use public transportation.
>>> Correct. 


¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
106304 Homework ±Ý*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-03-08 2
106303 It is generally believed that some people are born with certain... Á¤*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-03-08 4236
106302 In 100 years from now, how different do you think the natural... Çã*´Ã ¿Ï·á 2021-03-08 3
106301 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-08 1
106300 L... ¹®*°æ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-08 5
106299 In 100 years from now, how different do you think the natural... ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-03-08 0
106298 homework ÀÌ*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-08 4096
106297 My response is.. Á¶*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-08 4279
106296 The reason why English is fluency significant for me °­*±¸ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-08 4223
106295 My memorable trip À¯*¸° ¿Ï·á 2021-03-08 3
106294 Homework ÀÌ*¾Ö ¿Ï·á 2021-03-08 3
106293 Homework! À¯*¿¹ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-07 4701
106292 What is the best season in your hometown? ±è*±¹ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-07 4233
106291 My favorite book or movie. ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-07 2
106290 My biggest goal in my life is living happily with family. ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-07 4554
106289 What is the strangest food you have ever eaten? ÇÏ*Á¶ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-07 5087
106288 What can you do outside your house? ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-07 4166
106287 What are some reasons why people cry? ³ë*ÀÌ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-07 2
106286 Trust and distrust Á¤*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-07 4701
106285 Activities on a vacation. ±è*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-07 5349

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04