¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Do you think Arts have something to do with one\'s behavior?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*±¹
2021-04-03 709

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I think that Arts express one's emotion. There is various methods to care people's mind. Expressive arts therapy uses arts like movements, drawing, painting, wrings, sound, It is process of discovering ourselves from inner emotion. Peoples use the arts to let go, to express, to release.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Sir Mandeep! Thank you for taking time in answering the question. Here are some of the corrections, but other than that, you did really great. :) Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille

I think that Arts express one's emotion.
>> CORRECT!

There is various methods to care people's mind.
>> There are various methods to care people's mind.

Expressive arts therapy uses arts like movements, drawing, painting, wrings, sound, 
>>Expressive arts therapy uses arts like movements, drawings, paintings, wrings, and sounds.

It is process of discovering ourselves from inner emotion. 
>> It is a process of discovering ourselves from inner emotion. 

Peoples use the arts to let go, to express, to release.
>> People use the arts to let go, to express, and to release.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
107063 Homework (252) ¹Ú*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-30 1233
107062 What are some of the difficulties being self employed ³ë*ÀÌ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-30 1
107061 homework ±è*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2021-03-30 2
107060 grammar ¼Õ*¸² ¿Ï·á 2021-03-30 1296
107059 What is a tag question? ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-30 1156
107058 How is my family feature? ÀÌ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-30 1353
107057 I want.. Á¤*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-30 0
107056 I think.. Á¤*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-30 0
107055 I think.. Á¤*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-30 0
107054 I like... Á¤*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-30 0
107053 Choosing the right noun. ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-03-30 1586
107052 HOMEWORK ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-30 797
107051 Homework ½É*»ó ¿Ï·á 2021-03-30 1652
107050 Tuesday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-03-30 931
107049 Tourism today creates a variety of problems, such as pollution... Á¤*¼º ¿Ï·á 2021-03-30 1229
107048 My favorite restaurant ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-30 0
107047 Homework Ç¥*È£ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-30 5
107046 Is technology a good or a bad thing? ±è*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-30 831
107045 homework ÀÌ*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-30 1
107044 homework ÀÌ*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-30 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04