¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

How do you preserve beautuful sceneries in your country?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Á¤*¿ø
2021-04-05 801

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

In korea, there are many unique heritages which we have preserved for a long time. The Korean government set several rules, especially one of the rules is called a green belt to protect our beautiful sceneries from indiscriminately developments.
Korea has a small land but it has a long history. It has developed its own cultures such as architectures, religions and natures. Also, most koreans are very proud of their heritages and they have been trying to preserve beatiful sceneries. However, some people destroyed our beautiful sceneries just for getting benefits. That is the reson that the government set a rule and punish them.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello there Young Won!

Greed push people to destroy and exploit the environment until there is not left of it. The government needs to be serious in preserving what is left with these heritage or we will suffer more in the future.

Thank you very much for this composition. It is critical and well supported. Keep it up!

-T. Donna =)

In korea, there are many unique heritages which we have preserved for a long time. 
>> In Korea, there are many unique heritage which we have preserved for a long time. 

The Korean government set several rules, especially one of the rules is called a green belt to protect our beautiful sceneries from indiscriminately developments.
>> The Korean government set several rules, especially one which is called a green belt to protect our beautiful sceneries from indiscriminate developments.

Korea has a small land but it has a long history. 
>> Correct!

It has developed its own cultures such as architectures, religions and natures. 
>> It has developed its own culture such as architecture, religions, and nature. 

Also, most koreans are very proud of their heritages and they have been trying to preserve beatiful sceneries. 
>> Also, most Koreans are very proud of their heritage and they have been trying to preserve beautiful sceneries. 

However, some people destroyed our beautiful sceneries just for getting benefits. 
>> Correct!

That is the reson that the government set a rule and punish them.
>> That is the reason why the government set rules and punish for them.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
107357 Nowadays there is a growing trend of private car ownership. Do... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-09 657
107356 Write some sentences about your Online Seminar on Sunday. ¿À*°æ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-09 461
107355 Do you think it\'s important to get physical education in... ÀÌ*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-09 559
107354 What do you do to welcome guests at your home? ¼Û*·É ¿Ï·á 2021-04-09 570
107353 Tell me about your favorite food. Á¤*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-04-09 530
107352 Do you think it\'s important to get physical education in... Çã*´Ã ¿Ï·á 2021-04-09 0
107351 If you are going to make a movie, what story would you like to... Çã*´Ã ¿Ï·á 2021-04-09 0
107350 SMILE ANSWER º¯*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-09 551
107349 I... ¹®*°æ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-09 3
107348 Korea\'s top hematologist warns not to brush off AstraZeneca... À¯*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-04-09 2
107347 Homework ÀÓ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2021-04-09 3
107346 homework ±è*ºñ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-09 0
107345 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-09 1
107344 What will you contribute to our environment to make it cleaner... ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-09 0
107343 Homework ÀÌ*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-09 728
107342 What are your usual appointments? ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-09 439
107341 Composition º¯*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-09 1
107340 What three adjectives would you use to describe water? And why ±è*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-09 448
107339 Who is your best buddy? ÇÏ*Á¶ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-09 640
107338 Good Áö*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-04-09 567

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04