¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

In your opinion, what is the healthiest Korean dish?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*±¹
2021-04-06 820

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

There are many healthy Korean dish. I understand the healthiest Korean dish among all Korean food is the Jib Bab. It means a home meal that made in home. It is made by mother in particular, and it is composed of rice food and side dish. The food which buy at restaurant is sometimes so delicious, but it is not healthful to our body. The owner of shop often uses a harmful product to make a sweet taste. But mother do not use it for their family. It is the why Jib Bab is the healthiest Korean dish.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Sir Mandeep! Thank you for taking time in answering the question. Here are some of the corrections, but other than that, I think you really did great. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille


There are many healthy Korean dish.
>> There are many healthy Korean dishes.
OR >> There are various healthy Korean dishes.

I understand the healthiest Korean dish among all Korean food is the Jib Bab. 
>> I understand the healthiest Korean dish among all Korean food is Jib Bab. 

It means a home meal that made in home. 
>> This is a home-made meal.

It is made by mother in particular, and it is composed of rice food and side dish.
>> Mothers usually cook it, and it it made of rice and side dishes.

The food which buy at restaurant is sometimes so delicious, but it is not healthful to our body. 
>> The food we buy in the restaurant is sometimes delicious, but not healthy for our body.

The owner of shop often uses a harmful product to make a sweet taste.
>> Shop owners often use harmful products to make the food sweet, but moms don't use it, for the sake of her family's health.

But mother do not use it for their family. 
>> Shop owners often use harmful products to make the food sweet, but moms don't use it, for the sake of her family's health.

It is the why Jib Bab is the healthiest Korean dish.
>> CORRECT!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
106248 Homework ½É*¼º ¿Ï·á 2021-03-05 7
106247 Who is the most fashionable in your family? ±è*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-05 3865
106246 How do you plan to motivate yourself to improve your English? Çã*´Ã ¿Ï·á 2021-03-05 7
106245 Recall the period of isolation in writing_2/2 Da*d OH ¿Ï·á 2021-03-04 3
106244 Recall the period of isolation in writing (1/2) Da*d OH ¿Ï·á 2021-03-04 4
106243 Some people think it is better to spend and enjoy their money... Á¤*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-03-04 4631
106242 Vacation ±è*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-04 5697
106241 The best part about living in Korea ±è*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-03-04 4997
106240 Schools to begin new semester amid continuing concerns over... À¯*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-03-04 1
106239 The word \"ageism\" has been invented to describe the... °­*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-04 5219
106238 Homework ÀÌ*¾Ö ¿Ï·á 2021-03-04 2
106237 Homework (234) ¹Ú*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-04 4416
106236 What do you usually order in your favorite restaurant? ÇÏ*Á¶ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-04 3897
106235 Why do you go to university? ÀÌ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-04 4296
106234 What are you thoughts about having face to face classes even if... ÀÌ*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-04 3905
106233 Composition º¯*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-04 2
106232 grammar ¼Õ*¸² ¿Ï·á 2021-03-04 4254
106231 ¿µÀÛ ¼÷Á¦ ÀÌ*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-03-04 1
106230 My role model ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-04 2
106229 ¿µÀÛ ¼÷Á¦ ÀÌ*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-03-04 0

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04