¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

HOMEWORK

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ·ù*ÁÖ
2021-04-09 521

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Do you think it's important to get physical education in school? Why or why not?
-> I think it's important to get physical education in the school because of students' health.
If we do exercise, our health will be healthier than before.
And if we don't do any kinds of exercises, it will be very bad to our bodies.
And also it can cause some problem such as obesity.
But if the schools get physical education, students don't have to worry about these problem.
And it will be more good for student's mood.
In fact, if we do exercise, our bodies secrete endorphins so our mood can be very good.
That's why I think it's important to get physical education in the school because of students' health.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi John! That's true! Physical education is as important as other subjects in school. It should not be neglected. It can help us a lot in terms of keeping fit and being athletic. 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon!

I think it's important to get physical education in the school because of students' health.
>> CORRECT

If we do exercise, our health will be healthier than before.
>> If we do exercise, our health will be better. 

And if we don't do any kinds of exercises, it will be very bad to our bodies.
>> If we don't, it will be bad for our bodies. 

And also it can cause some problem such as obesity.
>> It can cause some problem such as obesity.

But if the schools get physical education, students don't have to worry about these problem.
>> But if schools offer physical education, students don't have to worry about these problem.

And it will be more good for student's mood.
>> It will also be good for student's mood. 

In fact, if we do exercise, our bodies secrete endorphins so our mood can be very good.
>>In fact, if we do exercise, our bodies secretes endorphins so our mood can be very good.

That's why I think it's important to get physical education in the school because of students' health. 
>>That's why I think it's important to get physical education in schools.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
105904 why I should save money ±¸*È¿ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-23 0
105903 Thousands of cold-stunned sea turtles rescued off coast of Texas À¯*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-02-23 0
105902 Homework 2.23 Àå*º° ¿Ï·á 2021-02-23 1641
105901 homework ÀÌ*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-23 839
105900 homework ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-23 940
105899 Whether or not a person achieves their aims in life is mostly... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-23 893
105898 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-23 1
105897 I think that the education system is necessary. ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-23 1168
105896 homework_21.02.18 ÀÌ*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-02-23 1
105895 If I can do research work on a specific subject or field Á¶*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-23 1
105894 The advantages and disadvantages of taking risks ±è*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-02-22 1487
105893 [2/18]Homework ¹Ú*¹ü ¿Ï·á 2021-02-22 1
105892 [2/17]/Homework ¹Ú*¹ü ¿Ï·á 2021-02-22 2
105891 Do you enjoy holidays? Á¤*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-02-22 1038
105890 Do you agree that having a lot of homework is good training for... ±è*¿¹ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-22 1
105889 homework ±è*ºñ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-22 1077
105888 What do people do during movies that really annoy you? Ȳ*Á¶ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-22 960
105887 Bond of my family ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-22 1
105886 Hm Àå*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-22 1050
105885 Title. ½Å*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-22 2

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04