¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*¾Æ
2021-04-16 750

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I agree to a certain extent.
Thease days, parent is too busy to difficult care about their's children.
So, it is helpful for their's grandparent and uncle, aunt to help.
Also children can learn about manners from their's grandparent.
And they get sense of closeness.
Therefore, the advantages are bigger than disadvantages, it is helpful to upbring is very useful to parent and children.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi there Eden! Thanks for doing the homework today! I appreciate your effort so keep it up! 
>>> TEACHER GEMMA
I agree to a certain extent.
>>> CORRECT
Thease days, parent is too busy to difficult care about their's children.
>>> These days, parents are too busy to take care of their children.
So, it is helpful for their's grandparent and uncle, aunt to help.
>>> So, there is a need for their grandparents uncle, and aunt to help.
Also children can learn about manners from their's grandparent.
>>> Also, children can learn about good manners from their grandparents.
And they get sense of closeness.
>>> CORRECT
Therefore, the advantages are bigger than disadvantages, it is helpful to upbring is very useful to parent and children.
>>>Therefore, the advantages are bigger than the disadvantages, it is helpful to up bring children by their parents.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
106669 fortnite season 6 ±è*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-17 4181
106668 writing: dinoursours Á¶*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-03-17 3
106667 grammar ¼Õ*¸² ¿Ï·á 2021-03-17 3221
106666 grammar ¼Õ*¸² ¿Ï·á 2021-03-17 3286
106665 grammar ¼Õ*¸² ¿Ï·á 2021-03-17 4696
106664 Homework ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-03-17 3287
106663 h Àå*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-03-17 6
106662 My homework ¡Æ¡ä¡Æ À¯*¸° ¿Ï·á 2021-03-17 0
106661 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-17 0
106660 HOMEWORK °­*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-17 3506
106659 Which do you like better, eating meat or vegetables? Why? ¼Û*·É ¿Ï·á 2021-03-17 4355
106658 My best friends are Hwang Da Song, and Hwang Da Sol. ±è*¶û ¿Ï·á 2021-03-17 3164
106657 Rocks Â÷*ºó ¿Ï·á 2021-03-17 3313
106656 What food do you want to enjoy for vacation? ¼Û*·É ¿Ï·á 2021-03-17 3962
106655 What is your dream ? ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-03-17 3255
106654 Change of past ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-17 3
106653 HOMEWORK ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-17 3145
106652 what makes me happy gw* yoonah ¿Ï·á 2021-03-17 2
106651 Wednesday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-03-17 3468
106650 What do you think will happen if your country is overpopulated? ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-03-17 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04