¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Home work(4.19)

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*Àº
2021-04-20 560

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

WRITING TASK: What kind of diet would you recommend to your friend? Why?
I recommend cutting flour diet such as bread, noodles, snacks and so on. Flour is not only harmful for our health but also makes our body fat. There are many foods which are made from flour. For example, hamburgers, pizza, bread, noodles.. which have high calories. These foods have much sugar and people are poisoned easily. That's the reason we should cut flour foods for our health and diet.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Ji Eun! I am so glad you recommended this kind of diet. It's really informative. See you! -Faith-
WRITING TASK: What kind of diet would you recommend to your friend? Why?
>> CORRECT
I recommend cutting flour diet such as bread, noodles, snacks and so on. 
>> I recommend cutting out flour diet such as bread, noodles, snacks and so on. 
Flour is not only harmful for our health but also makes our body fat. 
>> CORRECT
OR Flour is not only harmful for our health but also makes us gain weight.
There are many foods which are made from flour. 
>> There are many foods which are made from flour. 
For example, hamburgers, pizza, bread, noodles.. which have high calories. 
>> For example, hamburgers, pizza, bread, and noodles, which have high calories. 
These foods have much sugar and people are poisoned easily. 
>> CORRECT
OR These foods are high in sugar and people are poisoned easily. 
That's the reason we should cut flour foods for our health and diet.
>> Those are the reasons why we should cut out flour foods/recipes for our health and diet.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
108118 My Weekend. ±è*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-03 694
108117 Work3 ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-03 548
108116 Work2 ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-03 622
108115 Work email ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-03 674
108114 Homework🍰☕️ ¹Ú*¸® ¿Ï·á 2021-05-03 572
108113 Homework ÀÓ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2021-05-03 2
108112 Colors Àü*¼± ¿Ï·á 2021-05-03 713
108111 homework ±è*ºñ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-03 0
108110 homework ±è*ºñ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-03 0
108109 When do you usually have a family reunion? ¼Û*·É ¿Ï·á 2021-05-03 673
108108 Full vaccinated people can skip 14-day self-isolation À¯*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-05-03 1
108107 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-03 1
108106 Have you been in an interview where you felt like you are better... À¯*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-03 1
108105 homework ±è*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-03 561
108104 What¡¯s the best thing about your mom or dad? ±è*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-03 665
108103 How do you entertain your visitors? ÇÏ*Á¶ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-03 638
108102 Homework ÀÌ*¾Ö ¿Ï·á 2021-05-02 1
108101 Homework ¿À*º½ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-02 0
108100 Homework ¿À*º½ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-02 0
108099 Homework ¿À*º½ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-02 0

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04