¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Home work(4.19)

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*Àº
2021-04-20 592

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

WRITING TASK: What kind of diet would you recommend to your friend? Why?
I recommend cutting flour diet such as bread, noodles, snacks and so on. Flour is not only harmful for our health but also makes our body fat. There are many foods which are made from flour. For example, hamburgers, pizza, bread, noodles.. which have high calories. These foods have much sugar and people are poisoned easily. That's the reason we should cut flour foods for our health and diet.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Ji Eun! I am so glad you recommended this kind of diet. It's really informative. See you! -Faith-
WRITING TASK: What kind of diet would you recommend to your friend? Why?
>> CORRECT
I recommend cutting flour diet such as bread, noodles, snacks and so on. 
>> I recommend cutting out flour diet such as bread, noodles, snacks and so on. 
Flour is not only harmful for our health but also makes our body fat. 
>> CORRECT
OR Flour is not only harmful for our health but also makes us gain weight.
There are many foods which are made from flour. 
>> There are many foods which are made from flour. 
For example, hamburgers, pizza, bread, noodles.. which have high calories. 
>> For example, hamburgers, pizza, bread, and noodles, which have high calories. 
These foods have much sugar and people are poisoned easily. 
>> CORRECT
OR These foods are high in sugar and people are poisoned easily. 
That's the reason we should cut flour foods for our health and diet.
>> Those are the reasons why we should cut out flour foods/recipes for our health and diet.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
107563 homework ±è*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2021-04-15 3
107562 email draft ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-15 3
107561 grammar ¼Õ*¸² ¿Ï·á 2021-04-15 520
107560 Homework °­*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-15 448
107559 homework gw* yoonah ¿Ï·á 2021-04-15 679
107558 What is your favorite snack. ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-04-15 720
107557 My best friends give me some hair band, and lip balm in my... ±è*¶û ¿Ï·á 2021-04-15 505
107556 Homework ÀÌ*¾Ö ¿Ï·á 2021-04-15 3
107555 What is the best memory you have in school? Tell me about it. ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-15 500
107554 What is the best memory you have in school? Tell me about it. ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-04-15 1
107553 Thursday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-04-15 379
107552 Homework Ç¥*È£ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-15 6
107551 Society is based on rules and laws. It could not function if... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-15 542
107550 What is the best memory you have in school? Tell me about it. Çã*´Ã ¿Ï·á 2021-04-15 0
107549 What is the best memory you have in school when you were still... ±è*¿­ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-15 564
107548 Homwork ÀÓ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2021-04-15 2
107547 homework ÀÌ*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-15 3
107546 homework ÀÌ*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-15 4
107545 pet Á¤*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2021-04-15 624
107544 homework ÀÌ*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-15 4

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04