¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What can you say about requiring all women to attend the military as well? Do you think this is fair

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Ȳ*ÇÏ
2021-04-21 615

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

First of all, I would like to make sure that women and men don't physically have same ability. There are few women who are stronger than men but most women are weaker. Based on my experience in the army, it is not easy to get train without basic strength and the most difficult factor that people can't easily adapt to the army is military culture. Most people have experience of bully, violence and teasing without any reason. I am not sure if women can adapt to the strange environment which is unique in the society. I think this movement has started since some women didn't agree with the idea that men usually get extra points when they get a job. Women group think this is unfair. However, men think this is the valuable contribution to the country, so they think that they are entitled to get special treatment. If men think like that, women insisted to take the responsibility of military service and then they want to be treated same like men.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi there Mr. Hwang! Thanks for doing your homework! Keep it up!
>>> TEACHER GEMMA
First of all, I would like to make sure that women and men don't physically have same ability. 
>>> First of all, I would like to make sure that women and men don't have the physical ability. 
There are few women who are stronger than men but most women are weaker. 
>>> There are a few women who are stronger than men but most women are weaker. 
Based on my experience in the army, it is not easy to get train without basic strength and the most difficult factor that people can't easily adapt to the army is military culture.
>>> Based on my experience in the army, it is not easy to undergo training without basic strengths and the most difficult factor is that people can't easily adapt to the military culture.
 Most people have experience of bully, violence and teasing without any reason.
>>>  Most people have experience bullying, violence and teasing without any reasons
 I am not sure if women can adapt to the strange environment which is unique in the society.
>>> CORRECT
I think this movement has started since some women didn't agree with the idea that men usually get extra points when they get a job. 
>>> CORRECT
Women group think this is unfair.
>>> Women's group think this is unfair.
 However, men think this is the valuable contribution to the country, so they think that they are entitled to get special treatment.
>>>  However, men think this is the most valuable contribution to the country, so they think that they are entitled to get a special treatment.
 If men think like that, women insisted to take the responsibility of military service and then they want to be treated same like men.
>>>  If men think that way, women insist to take the responsibility of military service and then they want to be treated like men.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
107623 Email ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-17 0
107622 Email ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-17 0
107621 Homework(4.16) ÀÌ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-04-17 448
107620 COMPOSITION º¯*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-17 3
107619 What gift would you like to receive? And why. ½Å*°æ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-16 683
107618 homework ¹Ú*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-04-16 4
107617 Homework (264) ¹Ú*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-16 591
107616 Homework ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-04-16 467
107615 The top five most-watched sports in the world! ¿À*¸° ¿Ï·á 2021-04-16 511
107614 Why do hospitals or hotels hire nutritionists? Ȳ*Á¶ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-16 495
107613 The best memory I have in school ±è*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-04-16 554
107612 homework ±è*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2021-04-16 2
107611 grammar ¼Õ*¸² ¿Ï·á 2021-04-16 465
107610 Homework ÀÌ*¾Ö ¿Ï·á 2021-04-16 5
107609 Watching TV ÀÌ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-16 744
107608 The rudeness ÁÖ*³ª ¿Ï·á 2021-04-16 4
107607 What would you like to invent if you become an inventor? ±Ç*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-04-16 375
107606 Hiking is good at our mental health. ±è*¶û ¿Ï·á 2021-04-16 501
107605 How much does the weekend mean to you? Á¤*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-04-16 612
107604 If you can have a big birthday party, how do you want it to be... ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-16 547

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04