무료 레벨테스트 받고 강사평가 남기면 1,OOO원 쿠폰 즉시 적립!

혹시 사이트에선 찾지 못한 궁금한 점이 있으세요?
남겨주신 이메일을 통해 답변 드리겠습니다.

문의하신 내용이 문자로 발송되오니
연락처를 남겨주세요.
업무시간 월~금 오전9시~오후6시
(점심시간 낮12시~오후1시)

영작교정 게시판

영어 말하기와 쓰기를 동시에 잡는다!

자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
회원님들께 무료로 제공해드리는 부가 서비스로, 전문 분야를 제외한 자유 주제
또는 강사님이 내주시는 과제를 회원님께서 영어로 작성해주시면,
담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

What can you say about requiring all women to attend the military as well? Do you think this is fair

작성자: 황*하
2021-04-21 660

회원님의 영작문

First of all, I would like to make sure that women and men don't physically have same ability. There are few women who are stronger than men but most women are weaker. Based on my experience in the army, it is not easy to get train without basic strength and the most difficult factor that people can't easily adapt to the army is military culture. Most people have experience of bully, violence and teasing without any reason. I am not sure if women can adapt to the strange environment which is unique in the society. I think this movement has started since some women didn't agree with the idea that men usually get extra points when they get a job. Women group think this is unfair. However, men think this is the valuable contribution to the country, so they think that they are entitled to get special treatment. If men think like that, women insisted to take the responsibility of military service and then they want to be treated same like men.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hi there Mr. Hwang! Thanks for doing your homework! Keep it up!
>>> TEACHER GEMMA
First of all, I would like to make sure that women and men don't physically have same ability. 
>>> First of all, I would like to make sure that women and men don't have the physical ability. 
There are few women who are stronger than men but most women are weaker. 
>>> There are a few women who are stronger than men but most women are weaker. 
Based on my experience in the army, it is not easy to get train without basic strength and the most difficult factor that people can't easily adapt to the army is military culture.
>>> Based on my experience in the army, it is not easy to undergo training without basic strengths and the most difficult factor is that people can't easily adapt to the military culture.
 Most people have experience of bully, violence and teasing without any reason.
>>>  Most people have experience bullying, violence and teasing without any reasons
 I am not sure if women can adapt to the strange environment which is unique in the society.
>>> CORRECT
I think this movement has started since some women didn't agree with the idea that men usually get extra points when they get a job. 
>>> CORRECT
Women group think this is unfair.
>>> Women's group think this is unfair.
 However, men think this is the valuable contribution to the country, so they think that they are entitled to get special treatment.
>>>  However, men think this is the most valuable contribution to the country, so they think that they are entitled to get a special treatment.
 If men think like that, women insisted to take the responsibility of military service and then they want to be treated same like men.
>>>  If men think that way, women insist to take the responsibility of military service and then they want to be treated like men.

번호 제목 글쓴이 공개 상태 등록일 조회수
107469 Homework (261) 박*하 완료 2021-04-13 669
107468 homework 김*수 완료 2021-04-13 2
107467 Homework 이*애 완료 2021-04-13 4
107466 grammar 손*림 완료 2021-04-13 591
107465 My new hobby (2) 안*진 완료 2021-04-13 2
107464 My new hobby (1) 안*진 완료 2021-04-13 1
107463 Work email 김*영 완료 2021-04-13 0
107462 Yes! I have teddy bears! 김*랑 완료 2021-04-13 613
107461 Two things that make me happy. 이*윤 완료 2021-04-13 457
107460 HOMEWORK 류*주 완료 2021-04-13 545
107459 Homework 심*상 완료 2021-04-13 605
107458 Tuesday homework 류*우 완료 2021-04-13 689
107457 Do you prefer to travel alone or in a group? Why? 노*이 완료 2021-04-13 1
107456 do people in my country like to make new friends? Are friends... 황*하 완료 2021-04-13 591
107455 Where do you want to be in right now? 권*희 완료 2021-04-13 439
107454 Homework 표*호 완료 2021-04-13 5
107453 What is something that you are proud of and why? 김*열 완료 2021-04-13 517
107452 SMILE ANSWER 변*주 완료 2021-04-13 709
107451 leader 정*민 완료 2021-04-13 608
107450 Homework 임*민 완료 2021-04-13 3

HOW TO USE IT?

[마이페이지 > 수업 내용 보기 > 학습 캘린더 > 영작교정 버튼 클릭]

수업 횟수만큼 영작교정 게시판이 생성되며,
지난 날짜에도 게시 할 수 있습니다.

주5회 수업 : 월 20회 이용 가능
주3회 수업 : 월 12회 이용 가능
주2회 수업 : 월 08회 이용 가능
01
교정 내용은 최대 1,000byte까지 올릴 수 있습니다.

첨부 파일은 원활한 첨삭을 위한 참고자료로 사용될 뿐,
파일에 대한 첨삭은 불가능 합니다.

업로드 가능한 첨부 파일은 최대 2mb까지이며,
첨부 할 수 있는 파일 형식은 다음과 같습니다.

문서 - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
이미지 - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
전문 분야를 제외한 회원님이 직접 작성한 글만
첨삭이 가능하며,

올려주신 글의 강사님 첨삭은 24시간 이내에
완료 되는 것을 원칙으로 하고 있습니다.
03
하루 게시 가능한 글은 3회까지 이며,
종료된 수업의 영작교정 게시판은
이용이 어려운 점 양해 부탁 드립니다.
04

와이즈에듀케이션아이(주) 사이트명: 파워잉글리쉬 대표이사 전상현
사업자등록번호: 217-81-44736 통신판매신고번호: 2014-서울도봉-0233호
서울본사: 서울시 노원구 한글비석로 245 두타빌 B동 7층 713호
대표번호 1688-8672 개인정보관리 책임자: 안희영 [powerenglish@pweng.net]